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Jane Kearney

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  • August 20, 2014 at 12:09 am #63689
    Jane Kearney
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    This is toxic for you to harbor these feelings and could eventually impact your own health and well being. You know why she behaved in the manner that she did, so no mystery there. If you do not need to interact with her on a regular bases, then don’t. How can a sick person acknowledge what they do not see? What form of justice are you looking for? If you could have justice today, would that change what has already happened in the past? You need to heal yourself at this point. You are on the right track being a part of this web page, which appears to have many tools that can help you get to a better place within yourself. We all have had our crosses to bear in life and I can assure you that there are people out there with far worse stories than yours that have risen above their past. Write or journal what you are angry about, poor I all out. Then have yourself a little ceremony and say that from this moment on this is in the past and is no longer a part of my present or future, then burn it (safely please). Write down each day what made your happy, what you are thankful for and give thanks to your higher power. I always wrote letters to what I called the Karmic Board (God, Jesus, Budda etc.) telling them what I was thankful for and what they could help me with. Odd as this is going to sound, over the years I got that help that I asked for. My temperament could still stand improvement, but gone is my deep seated resentment of my childhood that I never really got to have. Please stay strong and work on this. You don’t want to fall down the rabbit hole.

    MissJane

    August 19, 2014 at 11:26 pm #63688
    Jane Kearney
    Participant

    Have you stopped and looked at your on going pattern with men? Do you truly understand how men think? Sorry, but I am going to disagree respectfully with other, that you have no responsibility for the failure of these relationships. These maybe relationships you should have never entered into in the first place. Two people always enter into the relationship and set up the dynamics that will play out. There is a life lesson here for you and the pattern will repeat until it is learned. Start by taking care of you first, because you are the most important person there is right now. How can you build a relationship when you do not have a solid foundation and are not secure with you. Poor upbringings we all have our baggage in this department, but what you need to learn is how to move forward and not let it define you. Barbara De Angelis Ph.D has two excellent books that saved me years ago. The first is “How To Make Love All The Time”, which has excellent exercises in it to help you workout any past resentments and hurts you may have. In the other book “Are You The One For Me”, this helps identify those unhealthy patterns with men and breaks the cycle. My first marriage was eight years of bad news, which was why I was single after that for twelve years. During that time I had many unsuccessful relationships, but one day I knew that I wanted someone in my life. After reading these two books, doing the exercises in them, within less than a year my husband of twenty years came along. He was out of my typical type toxic pattern with men, because I broke that pattern that I previously had going on in my life. Don’t despair and work on healing you and being happy and secure with yourself. Include in your day 30 minutes focused on improving you, whether that is exercise, self-help reading, writing in a journal etc., this will help too. Good luck.

    August 19, 2014 at 10:50 pm #63687
    Jane Kearney
    Participant

    I am sorry to hear that you had such an experience dealt to you by someone you trusted. My life philosophy is that there are no mistakes in life and that you entered into this friendship for a life lesson that has maybe not been revealed to you yet. From my worst experiences have come the best changes in my life, so don’t despair. If the financial loss is considerable, then I would suggest filing suit against the person or having an attorney send them a demand letter for monies owed you. I don’t know of any of us ever get to skip the lesson of being burned by someone. All I can say is Ouch!

    MissJane

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