Dear @anita :

thank you so much for making me understand all this and of course I’ve kept my education and my career 1st priority from the beginning…

as about Sid, yes, that’s what I needed to hear cuz somewhere in my mind, I felt he wasn’t that attached to me that much or maybe took me for granted whereas for me, I gave him much more importance than he did.. I got connected emotionally and missed him and when I told him this (even in the same city) he was like “yeah what can we do let’s hope to meet someday”

*and yeah I remember, we met twice for a short period of time.

and maybe It’s because the fact that his parents didn’t wanted him in a relationship before college, but then, yeah mine too didn’t but I still chose him because I knew I wasn’t letting it affect my studies.. at the same time he knew it too (he’s great in studies too) but I guess he didn’t really took that much risk for me as much as I did. I agree he’s not good for future but who knows…

as about Jake, I don’t know much about him as a date/bf and I’m yet to discover.. and as u said, yes he might be a better candidate.. exploring is better than making a wrong choice. I just wanna see how things work out with him.

Kitty

Dear anita: I’ll be turning 18 (complete) in the month of June, and my dad lives elsewhere (in another state) due to work but the thing is even when I and my family wet to stay with him for 9 months during pandemic, I was in relationship with Sid and he was also in same city, my dad had caught us when once he suddenly checked my laptop and found the folder in which I saved memories and photos of him. then after the 2nd time he caught us, we were trying to meet and that time he straightway called Sid’s dad and talked roughly.. that was hella bad situation for both of us. Afterwards I decided to call his mom and apologize for my dad’s words and i told her that it was a big misunderstanding.. she just said one thing “It’s ok child, but It’s a crucial time for you all, focus on entrance” ..

the thing is, both his parents and my dad won’t have any problem once he and I get a good college and go at the path of being on our own.. I guess being in relationship was/ is a problem just because I’m not in a college yet, and I’ve understood this fact now. As to talk about Jake, he himself has this mindset from the beginning that he wants to date after he’s in college and hasn’t dated anyone yet and so we’re not in relationship yet.. neither is Sid since we broke up but I’m in such a weird state in which I’m being my ex’s friend and we share each other many things, he also talks about this girl he’s slightly attracted to in his class.. and I don’t have problem with that, but I chose not to tell about my attraction because, I know he’s possessive and moreover he says It’s just an attraction with that other girl and doesn’t wants to be in relationship even In college.. (but I’m exception he says)

So the thing is he isn’t moved on yet or he doesn’t wants to be in any relationship (until he becomes doctor he says) but I think that he’s just giving himself peace by thinking somewhere in his mind that in future, we’re gonna be dating no matter how long it takes… see that’s the problem, he doesn’t understand the fact that I can date other people.. the one with whom things would actually work out.. and that’s why, if I’ll tell him even the slightest about Jake, he’ll get all angry and jealous… the thing is I really don’t want to break his heart by telling him about Jake.. and I’m not certain about our (my and Sid’s) future together… I’m stuck in this situation as it feels kinda wrong to not tell him about jake because everytime we talk, he (sid) indirectly tries to say and reassure that we’ll be together afterwards maybe and he still wants to meet if we again be in the same city (in vacations) after our exams and at this point I really don’t know what to do..

We’ll be going to college this year after the respective entrance exams we’re taking

Kitty💜

• This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by kitty.
• This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by kitty.