About Lori Deschene
Lori Deschene is the founder of Tiny Buddha. She started the site after struggling with depression, bulimia, c-PTSD, and toxic shame so she could recycle her former pain into something useful and inspire others to do the same. You can find her books, including Tiny Buddha’s Gratitude Journal and Tiny Buddha’s Worry Journal, here and learn more about her eCourse, Recreate Your Life Story, if you’re ready to transform your life and become the person you want to be.
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Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 
This hurts me more than it heals me. I’ve never been loved my any person before. I can honestly say this. I’ve grown up in near isolation for the past 20 years. My mother left when I was born and my father stuck me with a step mother that only cared about herself and had a kid that she made me take care of. This brother of mine did not love me either for he was abusive to me and everybody else without anyone ever laying a hand on him. I’ve had old Tonka trucks thrown at me by him. You know. The old heavy metal ones. I was bullied in school. Severely. Including by teachers and staff. I don’t know what I did to deserve anything that I’ve received in life so far, but any time I want to feel good or get this tiny bit of joy it’s ripped away. And I’m getting tired of standing back up and never getting the opportunity to take a step forward. Sometimes… I guess the message is, “Just learn to stay down.” Do you even know pain? Real agonizing pain? To never be loved by anything? To never be held by someone? To never feel a person’s touch? It hurts. More than you could ever imagine.
Hi there,
I’m so sorry to hear about what you’ve been through. You didn’t do anything to deserve the pain you’ve endured. No one deserves to be bulled or abused. I do know real pain. I was actually bullied and abused, as well. But this isn’t about me, it’s about you. I saw your other comment on my Tiny Wisdom post. I’m going to respond in depth there.
Love,
Lori