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3 Self-Honoring Ways to Deal with Low-Energy Days

Low Energy

“Being who you are is another way of accepting yourself.” ~Unknown

A few months ago I woke up with what my good friend and I call “the rage.” I was automatically annoyed by the tone of people’s emails in my inbox. I was frustrated by the lack of response from others. My tea tasted too strong. I felt cooped up in the house. Need I go on?

So I went to the gym to increase my endorphins. I figured that a good workout would be the perfect cure-all.

It wasn’t. I left my HIIT (high intensity interval training) pleasantly exhausted but still agitated.

Then I sat down to get into a Zen-like state with my life coach. I trusted that together we could get to the bottom of whatever this wonky energy was all about.

I cried, releasing beautiful misunderstandings about current business relationships. It was an incredibly healing session, and I hung up the phone thinking it was such a relief to know where this negative energy was coming from. But the lightness I usually experienced at the end of a session was nowhere to be found.

Instead, I felt sad and lonely.

It was in that moment, hanging up the phone from my coach, that I realized I needed to stop trying to fix my low-energy day. There was no one reason I was feeling this way. It wasn’t anything I did or didn’t do; it just was, and it was time for me to be okay with that.

The only place I had heard of such acceptance was within my Human Design studies, so I picked up a book.

According to Human Design, most of us have what is considered to be an “emotional authority.”

This means that we tend to let our emotions rule our decisions, and we can easily make rash decisions just to end the emotional turmoil we feel. Or, to the opposite extreme, we can say yes in an effort to hold onto an exciting expectation.

Most notably, our emotional authority is an energy that constantly moves through us in a wave pattern. Sometimes the wave is up and we feel great, and sometimes the wave is down and we feel off or have low energy.

I’ve learned that the key is not to focus solely on our high-energy feelings, or to get rid of our low energy. The key as Buddha says, is for us to find “the middle way.”

Release attachment to either end of the spectrum and find the still point. That is where emotional clarity lies.

Thus, on that day a few months back, I asked myself to stop pushing. I stopped pushing the negative emotions away and I stopped pushing myself into a more positive high.

Instead, I honored and acknowledged my wonky feelings in these three ways.

1. Self-pampering.

I hugged myself. I sat on the floor in my living room and circled my arms around my knees. Then, when I was ready, I went out to get a hot yummy drink at the coffee shop down the street.

I let my to-do list fly out the window, and I gave my body and my mind my full attention. I did a lot of journal writing that day. I like journaling when I can, and it helped me explore areas where I could really stand up for myself in my business and in my relationships.

2. The twenty-four-hour rule.

I released myself from making any big decisions. I knew my energy was all over the place, and the key was to wait for clarity. Thus, I gave myself a twenty-four-hour rule. I wouldn’t make any big decisions until 9:00AM the next day, at the earliest.

This wonky, negative energy was here for me to explore and learn from. It was still too early to start sharing a new truth. I couldn’t expect myself to grasp my learnings well enough to articulate them to others, nor could I expect myself to be in a place to take feedback neutrally. Not yet, anyway.

This rule gave me the freedom to explore what I really wanted.

3. Judgment-free space.

I deemed my home, my body, and the three-foot bubble around me wherever I went to be my judgment-free space. There was nothing good or bad, right or wrong about my low-energy day. It was here for me, as an amazingly imperfect human being, to experience.

This allowed me to embrace it and learn from it. It was no one’s fault. There was nothing wrong with me for feeling this way. It wasn’t going to last forever, and everyone would still love me in the morning.

When I woke up at 7:00AM the next day, I felt refreshed. The rage and negative energy were gone, and I could also see clearly how I wanted to proceed in my business relationships.

A huge sigh escaped my lips. I had allowed myself to be a part of the day’s adventure. Instead of fighting it or allowing it to take over my life for who knows how long, I had loved my low energy.

Which of these three self-honoring actions will you try when you have a low-energy, “rage” day?

Photo by rklopfer

About Molly Rider

Molly Rider is a Human Design coach who specializes in helping female entrepreneurs like you, stop feeling guilty, and start asking for what you REALLY want. It's time to thrive. Utilize your Human Design Chart to learn your unique strategy for success. Get a Free Audio with more tips at MollyRider.com.

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spiritual dragonfly

Awesome read first thing this morning….I went to bed ‘wonky’ and woke the same way!!! So needed this!!!! Spot on!!!!

Raj Thackersey

you can do all this or attend a 10 day Vipassana workshop – register at dhamma.org – your sub conscious mind will be automatically adjusted to behave in this manner. The key is to learn to observe how your mind and senses work, rather than get involved. This cannot be fed by reading articles or books, Gautama the buddha found that only by Vipassana can our system be tuned to eternal peace (note I did not say happiness).

Shish

Great post Molly, thanks so much for sharing your experience! I thoroughly enjoy it.

Tracey

Great post, Molly.

I have precisely these days every now and then too. I call them my “wobbly” days, and I invariably call in to work sick, confident in the knowledge that I’ll do more harm than good if I ignore what my body’s telling me, and instead choose to retreat to my own inner space and self-nourish for 24 hours. The world never collapses without me, and it works a treat every time!

Molly Rider

So glad!! We’re allowed to wake up feeling off, it’s okay! Hope your enjoying a day of self-pampering and judgement free space <3

Molly Rider

Tracey! I love that, ‘wobbly days’ is such a great way to describe them and thank you for being such a powerful example of self-love and self-care!! 🙂

Molly Rider

Thanks, Shish! So glad you enjoyed it. It’s a mission of mine to be more vulnerable in my sharing and I didn’t want other people to feel alone on their ‘off color’ days. 🙂

Kristine!

UGH I wake up with the rage all the time. I usually try to force myself out of it or reprimand myself for wasting a perfectly good day by accomplishing nothing. It never works, I just end up feeling worse. I rarely even try embracing it, but that sounds like the obvious answer!

Anna Mae

Thanks Molly. I appreciate your writing style. I like to express in the way that you express here. It is my desire that any person who reads my ideas has a response to it much like the one I am having to yours…a sigh, a memory, an alignment, and a “with-ness”.

Tania Yardley

Great article, Molly. I’ve had a case of “the rage” today. Good advice. I like to stay away from humans on these days 🙂 I know that urge to “fix it” and you’re right, it doesn’t work. Riding it out quietly is definitely the best way to go.

Steven Blake

A great posting, thanks. Our energy levels, emotions, thoughts and dreams are all messages we need to take heed of. When we “fight” the message we add further to our tension and stress. Hence why acceptance works! As with all messages being delivered if you don’t listen it comes back louder and louder until you do.

Cora Poage

THANK YOU Molly!! My have part about this, is the call to ACCEPT how I feel, accept where my energy is at and NOT make it wrong or bad…that was so so helpful. The minute I accept how I feel and just FEEL it, I tend to feel higher energy rather soon actually. LOVE!!! xooxCora

lisbet

I have had a couple of really off days in a row after being blindsided by a breakup- the first person I trusted after my divorce. :/ I am not sure where the line is between taking care of myself and wallowing.

Dr_Ace

Sounds great if you work for yourself. Sounds nearly impossible if you have to go into the office.

Baz

so easy to put the horse before the kart in the focus on forces in my life , thank you molly this seems to come just the right time !

Molly Rider

So glad, Baz!! I hope you enjoying lots of self-honoring activities when you feel you have low energy! 🙂

Molly Rider

Hey Dr. Ace,
Having been an middle school teacher, I totally know what you mean. Although, even back then, I let my fellow teachers know when I was having an off day and asked for space. I even rescheduled meetings with the departments heads or parents if I knew I wasn’t going to bring my best self to the table. It wasn’t easy to do, but it was the self-honoring thing and most of the time people we’re happy to reschedule because they too were super busy. It’s not perfect, but a place to play.
Best of luck to you in exploring ways to be self-honoring at work!

Molly Rider

Hey Lisbet,
How are you? Have you been able to find that line between taking care of yourself and wallowing? I can totally understand how blurry that line feels. For me the difference is in how I treat myself. When I take self-honoring action (treating myself well), I feel better within 24 hours. I feel more at ease, well rested and mentally empowered. When I’m wallowing, I’m usually lathargic and I engage in self-sabotaging behaviors like eating a pint of ice cream. Self honoring activities are those that you won’t feel guilty about hrs/days later. 🙂
Love to hear an update!
(((((HUG))))))

Molly Rider

Anna, thank you so much for sharing how you connected with my writing. It really means the world to me and I can soooo relate. I love writers who draw you into a memory, and create a “with-ness” – (love that word!) Thank you!!!!

Kathleen

I needed this article so bad. This came to me at the right time. Thank You! My only concern is that most morning I don’t wake up feeling refreshed. I haven’t felt that in quite a long time. I think I know what I need to do. This article put me in the right direction…

Buddha Bear

Thanks for this. The 24-hour rule really hits home for me. Thank you for a better understanding of this weird human phenomenon. 🙂