Author: Richard Kronick

The 3-Day Happiness Adventure: A Simple Guide to Getting Happy Fast

“You have a choice each and every single day. I choose to feel blessed. I choose to feel grateful. I choose to be excited. I choose to be thankful. I choose to be happy.” ~Amber Housley

What if I told you that you could dramatically and permanently increase your happiness within three days?

And what if I told you that it was much easier than you think, based on a simple and logical approach, completely free, and you already have everything you need to succeed? Would you be interested? I assume you would be, but you might be skeptical.

First, I am going to eliminate any skepticism, and then I will give you a straightforward and simple plan that you can implement for three days that will completely transform you, making you feel happier and leading you into a more grateful and abundant life. Sound good? Let’s begin.

The Source of Happiness

We’ve been taught that happiness is something to achieve, something that we go out and find.

We look for a relationship, job, status, or lifestyle that we believe will make us happy. However, this approach to happiness has one major flaw: we are basing our happiness on things that constantly change and are beyond our control.

By looking outside of ourselves for happiness, we are sure to have it forever slip through our grasp. Anything that might make us happy will not last, and this keeps us forever searching, always in pursuit. It has never worked and never will.

But there are those who are consistently happy. What’s their secret? They have turned their attention inward and have realized one of the most thrilling and exciting aspects of life: that happiness comes from within, and that we can consciously choose to feel happy by directing our thoughts.

Let’s try an exercise to illustrate this.

Take a moment, close your eyes, and put your hands over your heart. Physically feel it beating.

Be grateful for your heart and how it has guided you in your life. Ponder the fact that you didn’t have to earn your heart—it’s a gift. Think about how it’s always working for you, even while you’re sleeping. Really allow yourself to feel this. Take it in…

Did you do the exercise? If not, go back and do it! You deserve a shot at happiness!

Now, how does that feel? You have just redirected your mind to something positive. Positive thoughts lead to good feelings.

With a little practice we can redirect our minds to think positively and to feel good. By following the instructions for the three-day happiness adventure, you will come to understand how to do just that.

It’s All About How We Feel

Like anyone else, I have had my share of struggle and difficulty. I have had moments of deep sadness, regret, loss, and fear.

For years, I was involved in a relationship that tore me apart inside. I had pain and anger within me and I wanted to run from it, but I felt stuck and trapped.

Eventually, it became too much to bear and I broke free from this detrimental relationship, got rid of nearly everything I owned, and moved to the other side of the world, to China.

While in China, I went on a quest. I investigated Eastern mysticism, religions, and practices such as meditation, tai chi, and yoga. For years I searched, not knowing what I was searching for.

Eventually, a lightbulb went off and I realized what I was looking for. In the end, it’s all about how we feel.

We want a relationship, a job, a car, a higher status, to volunteer, or to fall in love because of how we think it will make us feel. And we want to avoid a breakup, a job loss, poverty, embarrassment, and the dentist because of the pain we think we will feel.

I realized that how we feel is ultimately the result of our thoughts and what we pay attention to. Therefore, happiness and joy rely primarily on our attitude and perspective.

I resolved to direct my mind. I was determined to focus only on that which I loved and was grateful for.

Within a couple days, my entire life transformed. I was astonished by the changes that took place so quickly. And I was completely amazed at my ability to direct my thoughts and attention, a skill that I had left dormant all my life.

Today, I wake up feeling terrific nearly every day. And many days I feel as if I am walking around in total amazement of the beauty around me, and in awe of the power within me. Yet, of course, I still face some difficulty and struggle, but much less than before. And that’s okay; some struggle is necessary.

From difficulty often come our greatest lessons: loss can teach us what is truly precious, discontent can motivate us to imagine and pursue a greater life, and mistakes show us how we can become better. If we never knew sadness, we would never fully appreciate our happiness.

Preparing For Your Happiness Adventure

So our goal here is not to become like a happiness drone, constantly in a state of blissful joy, sitting cross-legged in utter contentment forever.

Rather, the goal and the outcome of this three-day happiness adventure is to show you how to spend most of your time feeling good, feeling joyful and grateful.

There is also another empowering outcome from this three-day adventure: it will show you that you are ultimately in charge of your state of mind and how you feel.

In order to see results—truly exhilarating and mind-blowing results—you should give this your all.

You will not see major changes if you do this halfheartedly or give up quickly. But if you really go for it and persist, weaving these exercises into the fabric of your life over the next three days, you will emerge from your cocoon as a butterfly, full of beauty and ready to soar for the rest of your life.

Instructions for the Three-Day Happiness Adventure

The instructions are simple and nothing needs to be added to this. For the next three days, you are to:

1. Constantly point out what you love.

All day, as much as possible, look for what you love and say it out loud.

When something happens that you don’t like or if you find yourself thinking negatively, don’t fight it, don’t try to rid yourself of the negativity, simply look for something you love and point it out. You can say this to others or to yourself, but you should say it out loud as much as possible.

Say: I love the way you smile, I love the color of those flowers, I love the smell of this food, I love how you did that, I love how this texture feels, I love how that tastes, I love taking care of you, I love how kind she is, I love this song, I love that I have a roof over my head, I love that I can so easily get light by flipping a switch, I love that I can read, I love that I have hands to do so much with, I love that there is so much beauty in the world and so on.

2. Take eight minutes in the morning and eight minutes in the evening before going to bed to sit alone and undisturbed.

Remove all distractions, all books and electronics. Sit only with your mind and list off some things you are grateful for. Say everything out loud.

As you express your gratitude for each thing, person, and experience, take a moment to really feel how it feels to be grateful for that. Don’t rush through this. You can direct your thanks to a higher power, to your heart, or to nothing in particular; it doesn’t really matter.

3. Every time you go to the restroom, pause for a moment and think of two things, people or experiences you are grateful for.

Allow yourself to feel a sense of gratitude for these.

4. Don’t watch or read any news.

If you do this for three days, conscientiously and with persistence, you cannot fail to transform your perspective and your outlook. And, by doing so, your life will forever be more beautiful and joyful.

We know that happiness is a choice. Now it’s in your hands. A path to greater happiness has been laid out for you. Will you choose to follow it?

Happy silhouette via Shutterstock

November 4, 2015
The Key to Creating More Joy in Your Work
“Life engenders life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich.” ~Sarah Bernhardt

Ten years ago, when I first moved to China, I came as an English teacher at a university. I hadn’t the faintest clue as to how I would teach and I only had one year of experience as a teaching assistant in graduate school.

At the beginning, I was completely out of my element. In fact, I woke up the following morning after arrival in my new apartment only to realize that I had no food, couldn’t say anything in Chinese, and had no idea where to get something to eat.

For me, everything was uncharted territory, especially my new career.

After settling in, I tried to do a good job of teaching, and I truly did care for my students. However, having hundreds of different students and seeing each group for less than an hour per week, I did not see how I could make much difference.

Because of this, I lost my motivation and never really gave it my all. I could find no reason to excel at what I was doing because I couldn’t see how I could have any impact.

I became apathetic about what could have been a wonderful occupation. I dreaded waking up in the morning and dragging myself to class. When making a lesson plan, I would just throw something together that I thought might be sufficient.

In class, I just wanted to get it over with and move on with my day. I rarely stuck around to converse with my students and I often complained about my work.

I did what was necessary just to get by. I gave very little of myself and got very little in return. My profession became a job to trudge through.

You Get What You Give

Years later I began to work on improving myself. Naturally, this included my own job and I began to search for a way to transform my work into something better, something more meaningful. And I found the answer.

Fast-forward a few years, and everything changed. When preparing classes, I would construct course plans with meticulous care and would repeatedly practice how best to deliver them.

I would wake up each morning at 5:00am to make sure that I was physically and mentally wide awake and ready to give it my all, every single day. Before each class, I would talk to myself and whip myself up into a state of excitement, determined to make every class a masterpiece.

I started to feel genuinely excited on my way to class and felt great joy upon entering the classroom. I would stay afterward and speak with students, who were always full of questions for me.

Increasingly, I was able to see through the eyes of the learner. And, by being able to put myself in their shoes, I knew what needed to be done and how to execute it.

I improved as a person as well. I became more confident, learned how to hold the attention of a crowd, gained a much clearer understanding of the process of learning, and felt much more joy. I learned how to lead and to provoke curiosity.

I was getting significant, measurable results and I realized how huge of an impact I could have on my students’ lives.

It was true that I was devoting more time to my work, but what I soon learned was that I received much more in return. I could feel and see such love from my students. They were more cooperative than before, I gained their trust, and they showered me with kindness and friendship.

I was greeted each morning with enthusiastic smiles, and at the end of the school year thoughtful gifts poured in that brought tears of joy to my eyes.

I had completely transformed, and so too had the experience of my students. And it was all because of a shift that I chose to make.

The Key to Creating Joy in Your Work

What had happened? What did I do to create this incredibly positive change?

I made a simple decision: I was going to give more than anyone else expected of me.

This decision happened in an instant.

Back when I was still trudging through my work, one afternoon, I was walking through the halls of the school. I was struck by the fact that every classroom was full of silent, bored student who were playing on their phones or sleeping. At the front of every single classroom was a teacher speaking monotonously or reading from a slide on the overhead.

I felt pity for my students and was angry at the laziness that I saw. The system was a total sham and nobody was receiving anything of value. And in that moment I had a revelation: I was part of it.

I too had become lazy and was contributing to this horrible state of affairs. I felt a conviction rise within me: I would no longer be a part of the sham anymore.

Upon returning home, I did something that forever changed how I work: I thought very carefully about what my students needed.

I was struck by inspiration and spent hours putting together a new lesson plan. When I delivered the plan, everyone in the classroom, including myself, was shocked. The students were completely inspired and the entire atmosphere of the room changed.

Afterward, numerous students told me how much they had enjoyed the class. They requested more like it. Overwhelmed with excitement, I set to work constructing more lesson plans that would truly have an impact.

From there, it blossomed into a virtuous circle: the more I gave to my students, the more joy I received in return. And this made me want to give even more. Happiness flowed to me in avalanches of joy.

I never imagined the beautiful changes that would take place. My classrooms were utterly transformed.

Watching the enormous impact I was having on hundreds of lives, I realized something: all of this happened because of a single decision that I had made.

I created this change. And so can you.

And it starts with a decision: to give more of yourself.

How to Give More

The giving of service is the master key that will unlock joy and success in any profession. So, if you are not a teacher like me, how can you apply this to your own work?

What, for example, would it look like for someone with clients or customers? If you are a waiter or waitress, a secretary, a nurse or doctor, in sales, or customer service you would want to be attentive to your customers above all else.

Listen for and focus in on understanding what they need and find a way to deliver it to them. There is no better way to ensure repeat business.

If you are a cashier, be the cashier who everyone remembers. Make every person feel important by looking them in the eyes and greeting them with a smile. This will bring more joy to both of you than if you mindlessly wished you were somewhere else.

If you are a laborer, cleaner, or prepare food and may not interact with many people, focus on excelling at your task. Know who you are serving, what they need, and do it in the best way you know how.

And even if nobody appreciates or recognizes your work or you don’t get the results you expect, you will go to bed with much greater satisfaction and contentment knowing that you gave it your all.

If you dislike your work, the key to making it more enjoyable is to give more of yourself. When you focus on giving, you stop thinking about yourself and what you don’t like.

It is as simple as it is profound. In the end, the person this will help the most is you.

If ever you are uncertain as to how you can excel at your work, you only need to find the answer to these four questions:
1. Who am I serving?
2. What do they need?
3. How can I give them what they need?
4. What can I do to exceed their expectations?
Once you have the answers, you have developed a plan to excel at your work. And, by doing so, you have created the master key to making your job a labor of love and a source of joy for yourself and for those around you.

Love my job image via Shutterstock
September 22, 2015
Lashing Out is Losing Control; Calmness Is Strength and Power

“Self-control is strength. Right thought is mastery. Calmness is power.” ~James Allen

I would like to share something personal with you. It’s the story of how I first glimpsed what true strength and power is and where they come from. I hope this story helps to further illuminate your journey through life.

I remember one day when I was in the back seat of my parents’ car. I was probably about thirteen years old. We were parked in a hotel driveway, waiting, though I can’t recall why.

After a few minutes, another car pulled up behind ours and the driver began to impatiently honk at us. Soon he began to scream and curse as well. I turned and saw a man whose face was bright red, scarred deeply by wrinkles of rage and bitterness.

The driver had obviously lost control of his emotions, as it was impossible for us to go anywhere with his car blocking us in. It was as clear as day that we were stuck until he moved. What on earth did he want us to do?

My father sat in the driver’s seat, gazing into the rearview mirror. His face was strained with confusion, trying to figure out how to process what was happening.

My father is a great man, always striving to do what is right, strictly honest and keen to help others. Finally, somewhat frustrated, my father opened the door so he could go and speak with the impatient man in the car behind us.

I remember feeling afraid when he stood up because I knew that the other person was really angry.

I watched my father begin to walk toward the other car. As the car horn continued to blow, my father abruptly stopped and paused. He seemed to be contemplating something, and it appeared as if his entire being softened.

Slowly, he returned to the car and sat back down. My father’s expression was one that I had never seen before on him: a look of straining and struggle with a hint of shame. Eventually, the other man drove off and that was the end of the incident.

The image of my father’s face profoundly affected me and was forever tattooed in my memory. I was just a young child and, in my mind, my father was perfect. He was my hero and I idolized him.

He is not a large man and I have never known him to fight; yet I felt a tinge of disappointment that he hadn’t stood his ground and confronted the other man. I felt that he had retreated. And my impression was that he felt the same way.

A few days later my father shared with me a dream that he had the night before. In his dream, I had beaten up the man who was honking the horn.

At the time, despite being young, I was a black belt in Taekwondo. I remember wishing that I really had beaten him up. I wanted to get even with the man who had embarrassed my father.

I became full of anger. I imagined myself beating him up again and again yelling, “This is for my father!”

I was angry, partly because he had hurt my father, but mostly because he had hurt me. He revealed to me a flaw in my father’s character: he was afraid and perhaps not strong enough to fight back. It left me bewildered and, for the first time, I realized that my hero wasn’t perfect.

Something deep inside me was forever changed.

Years later, as a college student, a friend and I went out for a meal. While eating, an acquaintance of ours lost his temper and began yelling at my friend. My friend listened silently, showing no change in his demeanor.

Eventually, the man finished yelling and my friend quietly stood up and walked away without saying a word. I was so impressed by how calm he was.

Later, I asked him how he managed to keep his cool. He smiled and told me, “A strong person is not one who knocks other people down; it is one who does not let his anger get the better of him.”

I was stunned. I knew that he was completely right. Who demonstrated more strength: the person who had lost control of his temper or my friend who had kept his?

These words touched my soul and aroused in me an understanding of where true power comes from: it comes from within. And inner strength dwarfs physical strength.

That night, this realization lingered in my mind. As I was digesting this lesson, suddenly I remembered the incident with my father and the horn-honker, many years before.

A voice within me asked, “Who was the stronger man?” and chills slowly crept up my spine as I realized that it was, in fact, my father. While the other man had allowed his rage to overcome him, my father had controlled himself.

The other man had lost; he lost to himself when he allowed his emotions to take over. My father, on the other hand, had stood victorious over himself, conquering his own emotions, commanding them down. The other man was a slave to his passions; my father was the master of his.

It was then that I saw my father for the truly strong and courageous man that he is. The weak and easy path would have been to return anger with anger, yelling with yelling. But my father had the strength to resist this; he had the power to calm his mind while a tempest raged about him.

It was in this moment, that my own path became a bit clearer. I realized that I must embark on a journey of conquering myself, because I now knew that I did not want to be a slave. The only other option was to master myself, to command the hidden forces within.

When you feel negative emotions rising, threatening to overcome you and make you into their puppet, remember that the strength and power needed to maintain calmness lie forever within you.

Calm man image via Shutterstock

July 30, 2015