“A wise man makes his own decisions; an ignorant man follows public opinion.” ~Chinese Proverb
I’d like you to ask yourself a simple question: Do you know if you’re an introvert or an extrovert?
If you’re uncertain of the answer, you might accidentally be draining your energy with too much time spent socializing, or boring yourself to death with too much time spent in solitude.
Extroverts get energized by large groups of people and lots of external stimulation, whereas introverts energize themselves when they have time for themselves in low stimulus environments.
Understanding your social type can make a huge positive impact on the quality of your life.
My College Years as an Introvert
Back in the days when I didn’t understand my introverted tendencies, I used to think that there was something wrong with me.
Attending college in the U.S. was pretty confusing for a typical introvert coming from Finland.
There was a whole lot more partying and socializing going on that I was used to.
At times this environment was very exhausting for me since it didn’t fit my personality that well.
I went to bars and parties just like any other student, but I wasn’t always able to enjoy myself while there.
I remember one incident when my girlfriend, at the time, got mad at me because I looked miserable at one of the parties we were attending.
Of course, I wanted to fit in so I tried forcing myself to be more extroverted from there on.
That never really worked out.
I found it incredibly tough and draining to try to sell myself as an extrovert. The approach clearly wasn’t working for me.
It became obvious that something had to change. And since faking extroversion wasn’t really working for me, I began spending more time alone.
I discovered that taking time for myself was working pretty well, especially after days that had been full of socializing.
But soon I began realizing the drawbacks of this approach as well. I noticed myself drifting into bad moods after too much time spent in solitude.
I had moved from one extreme, of accepting all party invitations, to declining the majority of them. Neither extreme worked well for me.
This is when I first realized that I needed to find a good balance between the two approaches.
I learned a lot about myself during those years. I’m now able to arrange my ratio better between solitude and my social life. (more…)
