I’ll give you my view, for what it is worth. There is actually no reason for you to quit this relationship, except you heard a “rumour”?? that he was violent in his previous relationship?? Not clear on that one. You mention the age gap didn’t bother you but I’m getting the feeling that it did.
I think the on/off nature of the relationship is mainly coming from your dissatisfaction, no?
Being an older guy myself, I tend to sympathise with your partner more. I would be annoyed if you kept calling me up, because you can’t decide to just move on. Your post confirms to me that relationships with a big age difference don’t last long . And who’s to say you’re not the difficult soul?

• This reply was modified 9 years, 3 months ago by jock.

Hi Rose,

The age difference first of all is just too much here. I don’t care how nice, smart, fun, etcetera and whatever he might be. I for one would NOT take someone that percentage amount younger than me seriously for myself. Respect? Sure. But the dynamic can easily become or be that of Parent/Child or Mentor/Mentee.

And the report of physical abuse in the past? Him not bringing that up (whether he did or didn’t do it… It’s out there) was a sign of Disrespect.

Even before you found that out about him, you felt deep down that something wasn’t working. Gut feelings are there for a reason. Honor yourself AND your gut, and let this one go.

Best,

Inky