Dear Alexa Stewart:

Most of the money individuals and family units WASTE, money that could go to promote one’s well being, and instead does not, that wasted money- the reason for this wasted money is lack of mental well being. When individuals and family units lack mental well being, they often make bad financial choices, that is, put their money to ineffective use.

You describe your ex husband as not mentally well, alcohol and legal problems are symptoms of such (symptoms and causes). You describle yourself as not well for maybe choosing your ex husband to marry, maybe for continuing to be married to him as long as you did, etc. This is why the two of you made ineffective use of your money.

Your father: he didn’t father you well ENOUGH to bring about a daughter who is mentally better than you are. he may have supported your decision to marry your ex husband. He may have discouraged you in the past from making choices that could have been good for you and encouraged you to make choices that turned out bad for you. He had his own mental health problems that he passed on.

At the end, you, your ex husband and your father, most likely, all three in decisions made individually and together- made decisions that resulted in money being wasted, lost, not put to good use.

All three share responsibility for your father’s money not put to good use. This should- if you examine it and think it is true- this should cut your shame and guilt by 66.6% and that is way down from 100%.

What do you think?

anita

Dear One,

Your father must have known that you would need the money. Count on it as being the great gift and blessing it was. After all, what if you DIDN’T have the money when you did? Unthinkable, right?

The good news is you can start fresh now. Read The Richest Man in Babylon. Follow the book and put your money where it says to in the proportion it says to. Then, slowly but surely, you will be comfortable again. Dare I say happy. Follow Suze Orman too. (Wish my sister would!)

Inky