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Guilt in Relationship with Parents

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  • June 25, 2015 at 7:16 pm #78857
    John
    Participant

    Overall, my parents and I have a great relationship now. However, there have been many moments in the past, that I look back on and regret beyond words. For example, last summer when we went on vacation, I realize that I was not very cooperative with them, and could have done a lot more to make it an enjoyable trip. What’s done is done, but I have so much trouble moving past that and other incidents. I feel absolutely awful on the inside and it rips me up. What troubles me the most is that I made the mistake, learned from it, but still made the same mistake again. I need advice to look ahead and move on.

    Peace and love to all.

    June 25, 2015 at 7:35 pm #78860
    Anonymous
    Inactive

    It sounds like you keep making “the same mistakes” because you have not changed your train of thought/way of thinking. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Start with how you think, and observe what goes on in your mind before you speak. Ask yourself questions like: Is this hurtful? Is there a way to show more appreciation/respect? And keep moving forward. The more you keep yourself in the past with the guilt, the more it’s going to hurt. You need to try to let it go. You can do that by meditating or lulling yourself to sleep with good thoughts of healing and feeling optimistic.

    June 26, 2015 at 4:25 am #78876
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi oregonguy,

    Believe it or not, I’m sure your parents understand and chalk it up to youth/immaturity. After all, if you’re 30 years older than someone, you will always think of them as a “kid” going through a “phase”. LOL

    My dad expressed remorse to me years and years and years after my grandmother had died. He admitted that he was a little mean to his MIL and regrets it so much. I told him I’m sure she understood and was more forgiving about it than he thought. She never brought up any bad times and only spoke about him with love and affection!

    Strive to do better and you’ll do better in time.

    Inky

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