Alpal,

It very normal and usual to have odd feelings after we get sick. Remember how Buddha taught of impermanence, how things are always changing, never the same. The feelings of tightness and dread will dissipate with time, it sounds to me like your mind and body are out of synch a little… mistrust in each other, both having been through quite a journey.

Next time some dread arises, instead of fearing the fear and trying to run away from it, try resting with it. Be courageous and just breathe, with attention on the feeling in the here and now. Just beneath the racing quality of the fear is a tenderness, Alpal’s gentle desires to be happy, healthy and free. With the mind racing toward “it’ll always be like this!”, that tenderness is perhaps overlooked. Consider it more like how the outside of a pineapple might stop a being from getting closer to it. But, if the outside surface is worked with skillfully, we quickly see that its skin is actually quite thin. The fear perhaps is the same, a little bit of leftover skin around your desire.

With warmth,
Matt

Alpal , Suffering And Fear of failure or fear of life or whatever is a common unavoidable thing in life . If You r sick , You will have depressing thoughts Of Specific particular memories or thigs continuously for a LONG Time till Your sickness atleast decreases . If You Are not sick and feeling normal , Then You will be depressed about relationships or grades or whatever . The Point is suffering Is in some way inevitable . But if You are sick or body is weak , physical problems will increase mental depression Which will increase the stress You already have . Thats whats happening to you .

Now about Your physical sickness , there is no advice I can give Nor can You do much . Only a doctor and medicines can help You .

But regarding Your depression , my best advice would be To try something You havent tried in a long long time . Like for example , suppose You Havent played Basketball Or Guitar For 6 or 7 months . Well , play now . Just do something Which is relatively new I.e. you know how to do it but havent done it for a long time .

The Reason why this Procedure or doing this method MIGHT Work Is A Complex reason BuT Rest Assured Your brain ‘s repetitive patterns will Change .

Best of luck .

Thats why I Am Saying Alpal — People will say “Try to fight Your emotions ” . But the more You try to fight Your brain , The more we think about it And The more we suffer . I Want to suggest something … … Dont be involved in activities That last just a short time because After the activity is over , You will fall back into thinking depressing things . The best best way To do is You Have to go someplace or with someone Where You spend a lot of time doing activity …. For example why not go to your relatives place And Be There for a 2 weeks or a month And always Talk to them And To children ….. Thus by the time You Come back , You will Understand You Havent been able to think about any depressing thoughts for a long time Because of all the activity you have been doing And Your mood will already Have changed . And if You dont feel like talking to anyone because of Your depression , You might just find for yourself A Good social circle with Only caring friends .

” The One thing that should be banned if possible is loneliness “.

Hey Yeah,,. Nice post buddies.

Nice to see this thread here 🙂