Home→Forums→Share Your Truth→How to find motivation again?
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Ravi.
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April 28, 2020 at 1:07 pm #351952
AnonymousGuestDear Ena:
“I miss having someone to talk to about my problems”- I may be that someone for you. I don’t know of any books about depression, you can google that.
You wrote that you don’t feel like going back to your lectures in two weeks- does it mean that the lockdown where you live is expected to end in two weeks, or will your lectures be online?
If you want to, do elaborate on the following regarding your family: “they don’t understand it. They are only focused on their obligations, and are often complaining about things or pessimistic which doesn’t help out”.
anita
April 29, 2020 at 8:02 am #352088
EnaParticipantThank you for answering!
Lockdown is expected to end in two weeks, well week and a half right now. I had some assignments until now. I don’t have friends at college (the ones I had moved away to another town) and I am not much interested in the courses..so I am not really motivated to go. Though it is better than being at home all the time.
When depression first hit me, it was also when I was moving into another town (close by, half an hour by car). And my parents and sister were mostly focused on that, how to organise everything. Of course, they noticed I wasn’t feeling well and I told them I need to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.. we had some extra money then, but they were against it. They thought it wasn’t that serious and that the tea would be enough to help. I talked to them a few times and cried a lot, but… my mother told me something like that other people have problems also and they take pills for anxiety for a while or something, like I need to find a way to deal with it. My father mentioned once that I could talk to the family doctor (for a few times), he is also a psychologist, but usually pretty busy. And I need to talk to someone at least once a week. Also, I wouldn’t be comfortable talking to him about my family. I haven’t talked about this to my sister, she is pretty grounded and practical, she doesn’t understand my sensitivity. She knows about it, but never asked me anything.
I talked about it after that whole period, how I wasn’t feeling much better, but I got the same answer. After six months I stopped caring and trying to change things. I continued with my studies just because it’s a habit. At home I was reading or watching tv and I hang out with my best friend once a month. I also have a bad habit of daydreaming (inventing stories in my mind) and I started to isolate myself. This is how it is from March 2019.
April 29, 2020 at 10:48 am #352110AnonymousGuestDear Ena:
You are welcome.
You asked: “How to find motivation again?”
1. Regarding academics/college: “I had a lot of assignments, I was at my lectures from morning until 5 pm or 8 pm, I had little free time and that rhythm just didn’t work out for me”-
-after the lockdown and resuming college life, change that rhythm: lower your class load, less classes, more free time.
– give your current classes a chance, see if you get interested in the subject matter (“I am not much interested in the courses”). If not, consider changing your classes.
2. Regarding social life: “I had a few friends and we were hanging out at least twice a month (apart from seeing each other in school).. I was overly happy and satisfied about my life.. I had my friends”- you need to socialize, hopefully when college opens, you will have that back. Find a way to hang out with peers after school as well, during that free time you should have more of (#1).
3. Regarding hobbies and helpful activities: “I liked photography and walking in nature.. I was overall happy and satisfied about my life”- repeat what has already worked for you and which is healthy: walking in nature, and photography, as well as drinking that rea (“it did help with the ‘episodes'”).
4. Regarding your best friend: “Without her, I don’t know what I would do”- nurture this friendship- share with her in moderation (so to not burden her), and help her too, by listening to her empathetically.
5. See that psychologist you mentioned for free consultation when she starts working again, and maybe talk to the family doctor who is also a psychologist (maybe he will be helpful, maybe not, but you can try one session and decide then if to proceed or not).
6. Because you repeatedly talked to your mother and to your sister about you feeling very depressed and they weren’t helpful or empathetic- don’t expect future empathy or help from either one; the less you try to get their empathy and help, the less disappointed you will be.
7. Consider a daily exercise (30 min fast walking outdoors/in nature will do) as well as a simple relaxing guided meditation. And post here anytime.
anita
May 1, 2020 at 5:23 am #352468
RaviParticipantHi Ena,
though I am interested if anyone knows about a good book or free course regarding depression?
Maybe you can take a lookup at free resources on the below
i. EFT Tapping for Depression
ii. Donna Eden’s energy healing exercises for depression
Read about them and check out if it suits you.
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