Hi JHK,

Why do people ghost their dates or someone they are seeing?

Because it’s easier than trying to explain why they don’t want to see them or talk to them anymore. Because they don’t want to deal with the fall out and it’s just easier to walk away.

Does it hurt as much as being rejected?

Well I think it’s about the same. It’s still a rejection. It depends on whether it’s someone close, or someone more distant as to how much it hurts. Different in different situations.

Do people ghost their friends?

Not usually, unless there’s been a big disagreement over something. In which case, the people ghosting their friends are not their friends anymore.

Ghosting is a modern thing. To be ghosted is to be ignored, and not spoken to anymore, by the person doing the ghosting.  Usually on line or through texts…

Before the advent of online dating sites and media communication, people just turned their backs and stopped speaking to that person. Which is exactly the same as not communicating through media.

There are just more ways these days to turn your back and ignore someone.

Have a look at the Wikipedia definition of ghosting.

best wishes,

Jay

JHK

It is always easier to walk away then to be authentic and honest with somebody else. It takes courage and integrity to communicate, especially when the topic is difficult.

Mark

Who knows? But why would you do so?

Hello JayJay

But why will a person ghost? Is it because of not knowing how to reject the person in the context of dating

But why do people ghost their friends, if there is any issues in the friendship, it can be talked out but why ghost on friends?

Good question!  I think you may be right in the context of dating. People who ghost on dates simply don’t know how to communicate sincerely. Or it may be that whatever they say, the recipient is not listening, so in the end they give up?  I personally think it’s a product or maybe a social extension of the world we live in, everything gets thrown away, binned. You don’t apologise to your trash before you throw it in the can, you just throw it away.

In the case of friendships, I think that’s more or less the same thing. People who ghost someone else just don’t want the hassle of explanation. but I think in the context of friendship, for whatever reason, then maybe that person who ghosted wasn’t regarding you as a person, really, let along a friend, perhaps.

I have ghosted a friend (well, I suppose the modern term for ‘not speaking to you ever again’ would be ‘ghosting’), and I really thought about it for a long time before I made up my mind never to contact or speak to that person again. It was for a very, very good reason. And that person knew exactly why I no longer wanted to speak to them ever again. The person I ghosted did a shocking thing against me. She wasn’t my friend after all, and I really didn’t want that person in my life any more.

Just my thoughts  and honest opinion here.

• This reply was modified 5 years, 5 months ago by JayJay.