Home→Forums→Emotional Mastery→Managing Anxiety Trigger
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Anonymous.
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April 23, 2019 at 8:43 am #290247
Anonymous
GuestDear Ates:
Long term, quality psychotherapy/ counseling will be best.
Short term, if it is possible for you to quit that advisor without quitting your education and profession, do so. Can you?
anita
April 23, 2019 at 9:07 am #290253Ates
ParticipantDear Anita,
Thank you for your reply. Unluckily I am not able to quit my advisor without quitting my masters, since he is the department head and professors are scared of him.
April 23, 2019 at 12:39 pm #290265Inky
ParticipantHi Ates,
All that department head powers have gone to his head.
What I would do is shake that medical diagnosis around at him. When he calls, “*shake, shake* my blood tests say my (MS-Lyme-fibro-sickle-cell-Graves) disease is acting up and I am unavailable to answer texts/calls from the university between the hours of 6PM and 9AM.” Even a crazy department head horror show won’t go after a medically compromised student. A student with a blog. (hint). A student who writes letters to the Editor. (double hint). Well, that’s just me.
Can you be buddies with, THE PRESIDENT of the Uni? Easy to meet. Go to one of their fund raisers. He and the department head will be there and wonder if you are actually an heir. Once THE PRESIDENT knows your name, mention casually your troubles with a professor without naming any names. He will quickly put two and two together and the calls/inappropriate meeting times/etc. will cease.
Claiming your power will inevitably lessen your anxiety once you see that you do have control over your life. Once you’ve conquered the big bad department head, you’ll know you can handle anyone.
Write that thesis!
Best,
Inky
April 23, 2019 at 3:19 pm #290293Anonymous
GuestDear Ates:
I think that a lot of your fatigue has to do with your years of ongoing high stress level. My suggestions:
1. Plan every day so to have relaxation and resting time within each day, maybe listen to a relaxing guided meditation every day, one before going to bed if that works for you, do a yoga routine every day (the chest opener is very refreshing), keep your blood sugar stable throughout the day by having maybe 5 smaller meals per day, take a brisk walk outside per day, listen to relaxing music.
2. Find a way to assert some power over your advisor, someone’s power. You wrote: “He was calling me at 03.00 waking me up and tell me to do sth and send a report to him in an hour for example…he is the department head and professors are scared of him“-
– maybe your advisor is scared of someone himself, someone who has a say about his position as an advisor, someone who holds the conduct-rules-for-advisors/professors?
Imagine that this advisor calls a student at 3 am and demands a sexual favor. Must the student comply, and if not (I sure hope the answer is no), who can the student turn to so that the advisor will be disciplined?
anita
April 23, 2019 at 3:23 pm #290297Anonymous
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