Home→Forums→Relationships→Found someone I really like, but…
- This topic has 2 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 5 years, 9 months ago by Mark.
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January 21, 2019 at 1:41 pm #276013ConnieParticipant
Well, after taking a break from dating for nearly 1.5 years, (I focused on myself, trying to do a lot of self-improvement work.) I just got back into the dating field.
I met a guy I really like ever since my last relationship. We had a first date at a bar and talked a lot. In the beginning, I didn’t have any expectations. When he asked me out, I was even thinking “ok, let me just finish the drink and head home soon.” But it turned out that I really felt he fell into my ideal-relationship-type-of-guy category.
During our first date, I could feel he liked me, too. His body was leaning towards to me, lots of eye contacts and laughter, exchange of relationship goals, and he offered a second drink. He asked me if he was someone I expected and I responded with a YES. Eventually, he had to go and catch dinner with his friends which he planned already. We hugged good-bye and he gave me a light kiss on my cheek.
Before he left, we talked about things that we wanted to do together. So I got home and texted him that it was nice meeting him and I would like to hang out with him again soon. He then responded that he’s happy to meet up next week (which is this week). I texted back “just hit me up when you are free.”
I haven’t heard from him since. I could feel he’s an outgoing person and prolly has lots of things on his plate. But it’s been three days and I have started losing my patience and getting paranoid wondering things like: maybe that kiss didn’t mean anything? maybe he’s just not that into me, etc.
I have learned from my past experience that I am a very impatient person especially when it comes to dating. I try to relax and not hold any of my hopes up. But it’s been so hard to get him out of my head. I am consistently thinking about him and it gives me warm fuzzies!
I am not sure why I am making this post. I figured I just need some insights from a third-party point of view so I am not getting too disappointed if things don’t plan out as I wish they would.
Thanks for reading this and I welcome any comments.
- This topic was modified 5 years, 9 months ago by Connie.
January 21, 2019 at 3:41 pm #276021MichelleParticipantThree days is nothing, considering you said to “hit me up when you are free”.
I’m of the personal opinion that I don’t expect – or want – someone to be texting me too much after I’ve just met them. You’ve said yourself that you are impatient … I would give him time. Don’t pressure or overwhelm him. Things will work out as they should.
January 21, 2019 at 8:53 pm #276047MarkParticipantConnie,
I figured I just need some insights from a third-party point of view so I am not getting too disappointed if things don’t plan out as I wish they would.
Buddhism has the Four Noble Truths where the Second is that the cause of suffering is clinging or having desire. Another way of looking at it is having expectations. I think there is a 12 Step saying that “Expectation is premeditated resentment.”
You had one date. A lot of what you think you know about him is your projection. It is exciting and nice to meet someone whom you feel comfortable with, excited about and have warm fuzzies about. That is ideally what you want to experience in dating….And it is only one date.
Mark
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