Dear Holly:

I think that what happened is that you got very scared and then you shut down, went numb. This reaction to fear happens not only in humans but in other animals as well. The brain and body can’t handle too much fear so the animal goes numb. It is called “playing dead”, except the animal is not playing.

When an animal is caught by a predator and can’t escape or fight, it freezes, it no longer feels anything. This allows it to not move. Sometimes the predator goes away when it believe the prey is dead.

Back to you, you spent the night with him and threw up multiple times because of fear. Then you went numb, all feelings were gone: “the anxiety was gone, but so was everything else, I had no feelings”.

Are you attending therapy/ counseling regarding your anxiety (which is ongoing, or repeating fear)?

anita

Hi Again,

My sister went to college at 17. She always felt a step behind Freshman year. I can’t even imagine. Sometimes our brains are ready to leave the nest, but our psyches are still high schoolers. I think your anxiety isn’t actually about your boyfriend. It’s about being away from home at a younger age than your peers (even though these older college kids technically are your peers now). There’s a huge difference between a 17 year old and a 19 year old (boys whose moms strategically held them back) when it comes to being out in the world.

The relationship is optional. Most are.

Inky