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Relationship, Love and Spiritual journey

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • January 13, 2018 at 6:49 am #186461
    Inky
    Participant

    Hi Allen,

    Your ecstatic emotions and the other girl’s suicidal lows are both part of bipolar disorder. Not to say you can’t love deeply with bipolar, but the emotions tend to be extreme. It also sounds like your new love can’t handle the massive emotions either.

    It’s best if you both stay away from each other for now as it looks like you are feeding off each other.

    My second thought is I don’t like how these two women are trying to manipulate you.

    First of all, your ex shouldn’t continue to ARGUE that the breakup isn’t valid. Your “NO” is enough. You are broken up, whether she wants it or not.

    Secondly, your non posting of the new love on social media shouldn’t put her in downward suicidal spiral.

    Take a break from these two.

    Good Luck!

    Inky

    January 13, 2018 at 7:58 am #186471
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Allen:

    The strong emotions that you feel, those are not dangerous in themselves. It is amazing the intense emotional pain people experience and survive. Emotions feel so strong, so powerful, as if they can harm us… but they don’t.

    It is how we react to our emotions that can help or harm us (and others).

    If I truly understand that what  I feel is not dangerous for me to feel, then I am not motivated to react quickly, any which way, so to make the emotion go away. I am not motivated to react automatically, impulsively, habitually and I am able to choose my reaction.

    I hope you post again, if it helps you, for as long as it does.

    anita

    January 13, 2018 at 9:28 am #186475
    Allen
    Participant

    Hi Inky and Anita

    Thanks for messaging back I was worried no one would.

    The feelings and emotions are having a direct effect on my bipolar and thyroid which has taken me to a very dark place and no longer wanting to be here.  I lived with suicidal thoughts daily but this time I have taken actions and failed.

    I just have never experienced emotions like this and its scary.  I suppose at a base level the woman I love just doesn’t feel the same and its hurts like hell.  She encouraged me to reveal my true feelings and when I did I said I have never exposed my heart and soul to anyone like this.   I asked her so many times to take it slowly but her bipolar was in mania and i cant see, call or text her as she is very poorly.

    I feel pulled because I want to honour her request for no contact but I also wanna send her flowers and just say you know what I want you to know that I love you with all my heart.

    Someone said to me recently that if I take one thing away from this situation it is that I can love and have experienced love – even if its painful today, next week or even next year.

    I know with my bipolar I feel and experience emotions quite intensely and i am scared at the moment of breaking down, going manic again but these are just fears

    I have been looking at meditation and yoga today but dont really know when to start.

    I know I need to start loving Allen again as I have gone of the rails a bit.

    46 years to find that special lady and to then only have 3 amazing days just doesnt seem fair

     

    Allen

     

     

     

    January 13, 2018 at 9:47 am #186481
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Allen:

    You are welcome.

    You experienced loving feelings with this woman, feelings you never experienced before. It is a good thing, isn’t it, now you know you can. Next, you can experience enduring these feelings without reacting to them impulsively. Without contacting her for one, without sending her flowers and the like.

    There are plenty of meditations available on line, I understand. You can take a brisk walk, maybe that will help, or a hot shower, it may help, different things at different times, to relax, to calm down these emotions.

    The title of your thread included the words “Spiritual journey”- a journey from not feeling much love, to feeling much love, to enduring these feelings, to confidence in your ability to feel and endure, to…. a future loving relationship.

    * Will soon be away from the computer for about 18 hours or so. Take good care of yourself.

    anita

    January 13, 2018 at 10:04 am #186483
    Allen
    Participant

    Hi

    It certainly was  and is a good feeling and I am trying not to act on impulse.

    I will find ways to calm my mind and emotions as they are quite overwhelming at present.

    I have been seeking direction and guidance for some time and think I am just at the start of my spiritual journey and i really appreciate your words and suggestion

     

    Allen x

     

    January 14, 2018 at 8:57 am #186581
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Allen:

    You are welcome. It is possible to calm the brain. Different ways to do it and at any one time you can choose one way. If that way works, good. If not, try a different way. These different ways are like tools in your toolbox. You use different ones at different times. Post again anytime you would like.

    anita

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