Hi Mouse!

I’m so sorry to hear about your hurting heart– I definitely feel for you and know that relationships can be very confusing.  Given the story and background you’ve given here, it does sound like the best idea to give both of them some space.  Reaching out to ask what’s up at this point could likely backfire and like you said, have him end up pushing you further away.  I know it’s hard, but you can do it.  Once you back off and give some space, I think it might also clear your own headspace up as well so that you can sort through this more.

I hope this is helpful and good luck!

Amy

Hi mouse,

Can you confirm that you met Guy 1 for a chat about how things were going & Guy 2 was rude to you fllowing on your chat with Guy 1? Are Guy 1 and Guy 2 friends? I got a little confused reading this..

Oh ok. & in your eyes you don’t think anything wrong was said in the conversation that could have been misconstrued? I’m just wondering whether Guy 2 has feelings for you or something if the conversation went, in your eyes, fine with this guy you’re ‘seeing’.

Have you addressed this outburst from your friend with the guy you’re seeing?

ah ok.
In that case as said above I would leave it, in my eyes, if he wants you he will soon show up. He is clear on how you feel?

How do you feel about it?

The way I see it is that if you have aired your views & feelings to him – so for example he knows you like him, if he doesn’t contact you then move on. If he didn’t know your feelings, then I would say air them, but leave the ball in his court. There is no point chasing someone who doesn’t have the same ideas as you – you’ll only enter into something that you want more than him & that is never a good idea because you’ll forever be questioning it’s status.

When I met my now boyfriend, he couldn’t be happier to plan seeing me again, he is always texting me, he’s really open about how he feels etc

Hi mouse,

If this man is too busy listening to heresay and gossip and letting it get to him, then it sounds like he is a bit weak in character to me. If he hears something he does not like he should come to you directly rather than giving you the “silent” treatment and just leaving you hanging. I am not sure how old you are, but all of this, between him and the friend sounds like junior high school stuff, and that should have been left in Junior High school. People should not listen to gossip, rumors, etc. If he would rather listen and believe them over you, then come to you first, he sounds a bit immature. I feel you deserve a man who acts like an Adult, you deserve better.

Dear mouse:

Having re-read your previous threads, it seems to me that your communication skills need to be improved. If you like to make New Year Resolutions, this might be a good resolution to make. You were quite clueless, reads to me, regarding your first relationship, your “first love” as you called it and you are quite clueless regarding this beginning and just- ended, so it seems, relationship.

It will help you a whole lot to learn how to express yourself clearly to others, how to detect what you need and want to begin with, how to ask the other clear questions so to get the information you need about the other person’s goals, motivations, etc.

anita