Dear mntwinsfan:

The old friendship with Max is over and done with. The new association with him is more of an acquaintance. The good thing about the new association is that you no longer argue and fight, the feel-bad part is that you lost the comfort of bonding with him, before the argument/ fighting part started.

You shared that he was severely depressed, then came out as a gay man, changed his clothing, and started hanging out with women, no longer with men, because, he said he doesn’t feel comfortable spending time with straight men.

Reads to me that he is doing the best he can to avoid becoming severely depressed again, and anxious, not trying to hurt you but trying to emotionally survive his circumstances and challenges. If you can, let him be, accept what was and what is, and treat him respectfully in the context of the new association, no longer expecting it to be the friendship that was and is no longer.

anita