“The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money.” ~Unknown
Five years ago, in a move I wasn’t sure was so brilliant at the time, I quit my career at a rapidly growing ASX-listed financial services organization, packed up my life, and flew to Thailand to pursue my love of scuba diving.
I thought I was just going for twelve months, that I’d get it out of my system then return to Melbourne and settle down—get a job in the not-for-profit industry, buy a house, maybe get married and have kids, save for my retirement…the usual rite of passage. My unleashed spirit had different ideas.
When you answer the call to adventure, you never know where you will end up.
I fell in love with an Italian man, completed my Scuba Diving Instructor course, and spent the next few years splitting my time between Australia and Thailand.
When our relationship ended, I returned to Melbourne “to be sensible,” to try and put down some roots and figure out, once and for all, what I was meant to do with my life.
I returned to work with my former employer, but fifteen months later, when I was still trying to figure things out, the universe gave me a divine kick up the bum; I was suddenly and unexpectedly made redundant.
Instead of finding another job, again I answered the call to adventure. Ten weeks later I was in Canterbury, England following the 2,000-kilometer Via Francigena pilgrimage route to Rome, living a dream.
When I returned to Melbourne to integrate all that I had learned on my pilgrimage, my bank account had dropped way below my comfort level and the job market was really slow; employers didn’t seem to appreciate my unconventional life that appeared as (well-explained) gaps in my CV.
Living in suburbia, I started to compare my life to my friends who were getting married, having kids, and buying houses. I looked at my dwindling bank account balance, ten-year-old car, and unpacked bags of clothes—the sum total of my life. I began to panic.
From my economic studies, I know the opportunity cost of walking away from my career five years ago to follow my heart into adventure is close to a million.
As a financial planning professional, I know that the longer you delay buying a house, the more you have to pay and the less achievable it becomes. And the longer you delay saving for retirement, the more you have to save or the longer you need to work.
These are the realities of living in our modern world, where money is the common form of value exchange and it costs to live—to put shelter over your head, food in your belly, and clothes on your back.
Acutely aware of this, I promised myself I would never ruin myself financially by living unconventionally. I feared that was exactly what I had done.
As I walked those 2,000 kilometers alone, I discovered the quiet voice of wisdom that speaks up when I ask it for guidance, or it decides there is something I need to hear. In that moment of panic, it told me this:
“Your net worth is not your life’s worth—don’t confuse the two.”
Your net worth is not your life’s worth. There was instant relief in those words.
My choices may have “cost” me a million, and my net worth may be a small fraction of that, but the real value of my experiences over the last five years transcends physical currency. The sights I have seen. The blessings I have received. The moments I have witnessed.
Diving in the ocean with sharks and manta rays, watching a volcano erupt, crossing the Alps and the Apennines alone on foot, dancing ecstatically in the rain at a dance party in India, caring for street dogs and orphans, muddling through French and Italian conversations with locals, and watching the sun die a vibrant death hundreds of times.
These experiences have transformed me and, because I am changed, affect the lives of those whose paths I cross like ripples on a pond.
In a world that requires us to earn money, the popular pursuit of purpose these days is by offering your skills, talents, and abilities to earn money doing what you love—that is, to create a business outside of the traditional corporate environment and make that your purpose.
But what if your dreams are not the type that will earn you money? And what if following your dreams requires that you walk away from a high-paying career, or that you spend your savings or forego buying a house so that you can live your dream?
Often misconceived as selfishness, honoring and doing what transforms our inner selves is a way of being of service too; everyone who comes into contact with your ripples will benefit from that change, directly or indirectly, known or unknown.
In this way, the return on investment from following your dreams is infinite, larger than you can ever quantify or know while you are in human form.
But what about the cost of not following your dreams?
How will you feel at the end of your life if you don’t give your dream a go? How will you feel living in a big ole house with plenty of cash in your bank account and very healthy retirement savings, but with your neglected dreams fading away in the corner?
I know that one day, when I am old and dying, I won’t regret the things I never had, but I will regret the moments I didn’t seize and the adventures and growth I never experienced.
I know that every time I have followed my heart and answered the call to adventure, even when I wasn’t sure where the money was going to come from or how it was all going to turn out, life has shown me that it will support me. It will support you, too.
Although it might never be reflected in your net assets, follow your heart and your dreams, focus on growing your life’s worth, not just your net worth, and no matter where your life takes you or what your external wealth looks like, you will be truly en-riched.
Child pilot image via Shutterstock
About Kym Wilson
Kym Wilson is a certified holistic counselor, energy and spiritual healer, and author of The Path You Make. She supports soulful people navigate life challenges and hard times facilitating them to dive deep into their soul, tend wounded places and emerge empowered and transformed. She writes about how to feel safe to be you and live from your soul at www.kymwilson.com.au/blog Subscribe to her newsletter here and receive a workbook to map your way out of stuckness.
Though I run this site, it is not mine. It's ours. It's not about me. It's about us. Your stories and your wisdom are just as meaningful as mine. 
This article came at a great time for me! Thanks for the reminder.
Great post. Invest in yourself and you’ll never be broke!
You are welcome Kavita.
Thanks Bryan. Truth!
Great advice!
Excellent post, Kym. Thank you for sharing your courage and bravery in charting your own course in life. All creative people, artists, dreamers and people who are charting their own course can relate to this. I could resonate with many areas you mentioned in the post. I’m thinking how much I gave up in monetary value to pursue my dreams. Financially wise – no. Life wise and rich – absolutely. I’m willing to chart the course even if it seems completely different than anyone that I personally know is taking. I would not be true to myself if I didn’t. It’s so easy to get trapped in society’s dictates and orders that we forget to live our own lives.
It always seems that everytime I get to this website the articles speak exactly to what I’m going through. How do you guys know? 🙂 Thank you for making me take a step back and realize that, although I’m not financially stable at this moment, I’ve had a hell of a lot of great experiences at my age. And that being happy in life is what it’s all about.
This post really resonated with me, thank you so much for sharing it. I am in graduate school to be a mental health counselor, and it is frustrating to see those around me make more money than I might ever make straight out of undergrad. I keep reminding myself though that we all have a different path, and I know that this path makes me happy, and happiness is more important than what money can bring.
One of the greatest articles I have read recently. Many of the published articles that talk about following your dreams end up mentioning how following their dreams made them even more successful financialy (example: writing a popular book; becoming a high end self mentors) which is an unrealistic generalisation and makes me feel what if my dream wont make me enough money? However your article is lovely and realistic. Indeed, the point here is not the money but the worth of experience. Thanks, i feel inspired.
Perfect. Period. 🙂
Thank you.
Great post Kym – you can feel that sense of enrichment you talk about from your experiences coming through so strongly. Fantastic message.
We are not alone in what we experience Lindsay. And life is definitely not all about the money. Many blessings to you.
Take
actions that make you proud, have faith in yourself, and you’ll always end up
where you need to be.
Melanie we all have a tendency to compare ourselves but we have to let that go because our paths are so different and I e us not better than the other. Jobs that create money always pay higher whilst some of the most important jobs like teaching, counselling etc are not valued highly from a financial point of view. There is a mental health crisis in many developed countries and the world needs people like you. Best wishes for the rest of your studies.
Thank you Lina that is exactly why I wrote it as I feel the same way. Many blessings, Kym.
And thank you Elizabeth. Blessings, Kym.
Thank you Kathy. When I write about them it helps me reconnect to them more strongly too. Many blessings to you, Kym.
Ah yes, well said Vishnu. Wishing you many more rich blessings in your life, Kym.
It’s great reading this on a day when I’ve sunk over $50,000 into producing a TV series over here, and my ex-boyfriend from two boyfriends ago, who for years subtly and openly tried to plant doubt in me about ever succeeding (and to this day still refuses to watch any segments of the series, claiming ever to have “oops, lost the link, can you re-send it?”), sees I haven’t given up and am still filming it, and now wants to insinuate back in my life where he can swing a skillet round again and smash my confidence some more. Well, it ain’t happenin’.
Nobody EVER gets to do that again.
You need supporters when you do the things you list in this article. Building your buddy team is tough work but it is essential. I will remove people from mine if I begin to sense they are not Team Snowflake. I actually have a little saying: “Team Snowflake, or There: Here’s The Exit.” Subtle detractors who warn you “for your own good” can absolutely sabotage your ascent. Learn to recognize em. Better still, get faster at pushing the eject button on em.
It’s lonely up here in the arts. I rely on the Law of Attraction and have become a master at successfully obtaining donations and grants from people. It’s kept me alive and my television show on the air. It’s led to successes. Very recently, one of Martin Scorsese’s confidantes peeked at the show and decided to join my production staff; then, the executive producer of the most popular and successful TV series currently on the air today contacted me out of the blue, said he’d seen my clips online, and offered me an upcoming job writing and directing some episodes for his next series.
Hearing that, the ex decided it was time to try to slide back into my good graces and into my life. (But only women are gold-diggers, remember that, folks.)
I’ve given up a steady paycheck, good credit, my university degree and romantic relationships to direct here in Hollywood. Marriage certainly is a thing I will never experience. Men can’t handle having a career woman and if she’s damned good at Specific Thing, their instinctive response seems to be Sabotage It. (They’ll deny this below, and women who have not experienced it will deny it occurs; but the rest of us know it very well does and the male sabotage instinct sadly does happen.)
I think I’ve almost made peace with it.
I went within a few moments ago, worried about a slate of scary upcoming bills and that my absolute commitment to continuing to produce the show will pretty much assure no day job gets found and no regular salary comes in. I sank into meditation and asked quietly within, “What should I do?” The answer came back:
“You will be fine.”
Clear as day. Soft and clear. A voice not a voice, almost more a feeling than spoken words, emanating simultaneously from both within and everywhere.
This same voice/feeling told me to persevere and believe when I first got a hunch I should leave my most recent romantic partner (the one who drifted along after I let go of confidence-smashing-skillet-swinger ex), but I believe it in this case. When it comes to finances and career, it is never wrong.
When I cut up my EBT card years ago and swore I would never work for another person’s company again, but instead my own, directing movies, that voice assured me it was right and I would be fine. And you know what? Step by step, I was fine.
Here at this moment, too, which is eternal, I am fine.
And I, and all of us, whatever we choose to do, if we heed our instinct unflinchingly, and follow our dreams, we will continue to be just fine.
Exactly Julie!
Bravo! What adventures you’ll have to tell and remember! Far more enlightening than doing the “norm”.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you every success with your production. May your dreams come true.
I’ve had some truly wonderful adventures but when I’ve returned I’ve lived a very normal life in Melbourne. Fortunately, I discovered how to see the beauty and blessings in everyday life too. Many blessings to you.
Thank you Meg. Many blessings to you.
This really made me think.
THAT, I believe, is the key to happiness.
Congratulations on your exciting successes! And congratulations having the courage to make sacrifices to follow your dreams. I am jealous, having done the opposite so far in my 25 years of career, taking the safe but lucrative route. Since you asked for comment, I must add my thoughts about skillet swinger and your generalization about the possibility of a successful relationship. You had continued to allow him to have power over your self esteem by caring if he watched an episode. You are right to shut him out. But now that you are getting meaningful feedback and success, you will be able to trust yourself. Then your law of attraction can work for men as well. I can assure you, there are men out there who can handle a successful woman partner. Perhaps not the norm. But they exist. If you don’t believe it, your law of attraction won’t help. Try to know it. I am very successful by most criteria, and ten years ago found a match who was smart enough, kind enough, and not an egomaniac. He is perfectly accepting of our disparate income, and has never tried to hurt my confidence about my career. He only encourages me and lifts me up in the arena, although we have struggled at times in other areas. Try to be encouraged that when the time is right and you are not vulnerable to their attacks anymore, you can find one of the many who wil support and not try to tear you down. Men take longer to mature than women. Wait for them to catch up.
I have to just comment that I am constantly reading articles such as this about “living your dream” or “following your bliss” without mention of the funds needed to do so. It took money to get you from Melbourne to Thailand, and even more money to buy the scuba gear, get certified, and sustain yourself while you were there. It took money to get you from Melbourne to England and back again. Unless you were born into wealth or received a considerable financial gift, you had to have a job to get the money to do these things. Fortunately for you, you either earned enough to have savings or somehow had the funds to do these things. Many people don’t have that sort of luxury. Many are living paycheck to paycheck and are unwilling, and/or, unable to walk away from family responsibilities. I feel these type of articles malign the people you call “conventional” and assumes that they are missing out on life because they have to have a job for their daily living and may also have a family. ( I’d also like to say that if you are looking for a challenge, adventure, and something that will profoundly change your heart, outlook, and life, try raising a child or being in a marriage. For me, these have been spiritual practices with challenges and rewards that I never could have anticipated.) I write this with humbleness and respect and simply want to speak up for the employed parents who are often slighted as being “conventional” in these type articles. And I’d like to ask, how do you follow your dream to travel and have a year without employment if you don’t have the funds to do so?
wow, somebody sent this to me today. Its my last of the corporate working life today. Been there done that and now given up… to follow my dream of backpacking in europe with a one way ticket till the money runs out… I dont know after that what? But i am not scared. after reading this, i am not the least bit scared… thank you for this awesome piece of writing.
I am glad you got something out of it Tayla. Blessings.
Dear Curious Parent, my intention was not and is not to judge anyone’s life choices nor to slight anyone as conventional. Every one’s life path is different and contains the experiences and lessons they need in this lifetime whether it be as a parent, a cleaner, a CEO or an adventurer. If you think of Maslow’s hierarcy, our basic needs have to be met before we desire or focus on higher level needs. Someone who is struggling to meet their physiological or safety needs is probably not thinking about self-actualisation or at least not in a position to do anything about that. The key intended audience of this article is people who are able to meet their physiological and safety needs and are in somewhat of a similar position to what I have been in. I wouldn’t dare dream of telling someone who is struggling to make ends meet week to week or day by day to go travel and live your dreams – that is unfair and unrealistic. Those other articles that you refer to probably have a similar intended audience. It’s not meant to exclude people in a rude or bad way but writers usually write for specific audiences, not a one size fits all. So whlist not all of this article will apply to everyone, the key message that I think applies to everyone is that your net worth is not your life’s worth and I would hope that you and others who read it don’t judge the value of their life by how much or little money they have in the bank. Many blessings to you.
Liz, I am so happy for you and your dream. I can feel your excitement and your fearlessness in your words. Wishing you a wonderful adventure.
Ah yes I’ve glimpsed that within myself too. For me, it can be my ego telling me I’m not enough and I need to do more to prove myself and be worthy. I
I would also like to add that pursuing your dreams does not mean pursuing something extravegant and far reaching. Just because the authors dream was quite costly doesn’t mean your dream has to be. A dream could be as simple as writing a novel, becoming a yoga instructor, volunteering to help oversees, becoming an artist/musician, starting up a blog, getting serious about a craft and selling it, etc. All of these that I mentioned cost very little. Arts and music require materials, but if you save up a few months you can afford them. Volunteering oversees is practically free if you can get sponsorship or do fundraising. Writing, cooking, etc. costs nothing and just requires time.
Also, following a dream is not doing something you don’t normally do. For some it could be raising a family or being in a really good relationship. Many people that travel the world or are great artists are often very lonely people who have a longing for family. People often take things up because they are missing self-expression. The key in life is to find what brings you happiness, because no matter what you will likely not feel satisfied if you don’t appreciate what you have now. Authors like Eckhart Toll have said awareness is the key, and with full awareness even a boring desk job is a joy.
We tend to have a kind of one-upmanship where we want to say “my dream is more exotic and special than your dream.” Let go of all this.
Dear Kym, I appreciate your response and the sentiment that you share that your net worth does not equate to your personal worth or to your experience as a human being. I also deeply appreciate your observation of how living your dream has a ripple effect on the world at large. That being said, I have to say that I am surprised that you think people of limited means are not interested in self actualization or do not have dreams that they want to live out. Your statement that you would not advise those people to live their dreams because it would be unfair and unrealistic is at the same time saying that living your dream is only for those in a similar financial situation as yourself. While that may be a sizable audience, I have to wonder how big that audience really is. But the main reason I wrote a response to this article was to comment on the frequent use of the words “conventional” and “safe” to describe those with either a “job,” a family, or both. These words have an inherent slight in them against what most of the world has to do out of necessity. I feel those words are used in a way that Jordan refers to as a one-upmanship of dreams. I appreciate Jordan expressing that dreams, and fulfilling those dreams, are available to all, even those who may be working a boring desk job or changing diapers. Thank you again for both your article and response.
I totally agree with you Jordan. One of my dreams is to write fiction books and for now, I’m starting with short stories. I’m not betting on them making money but I write for the fun of it. It takes time, energy and a bit of money as I’ve signed up for creative writing classes. And maybe someday I’ll publish something too =)
Kym: Loved your post. I think it speaks to the notion that personal experiences can be valuable without them being lucrative.
Nice! I’ve started writing fiction about 9 months ago. I’ve always wanted to write, but never did because I thought I was too busy and wasn’t good enough. Once I realized that I write because I enjoy it and not necessarily to make a career out of it (but I wouldn’t complain if I did!) it totally changed my perspective.
Good for you Jordan! These online classes are really cool, I’ve taken a few the past 5 years or so and it’s helped my writing =)
http://www.writingclasses.com/index.php
Kym, thank you so much for sharing this truth. As someone who made a similar decision recently to follow my heart and passion, I can relate to everything you wrote. It reminded me of a conversation with my mom and trying to explain to her why I wasn’t going right back into an unwilling but lucrative corporate job after my redundancy … I said “I don’t want to be on my death bed and look back at this time of my life and ask myself why didn’t I even try?”
So, I’m stepping out as you are with a passion to follow my heart and trusting the net worth of my life will be paid in ways unimaginable!
This is so true. I did something similar with my life about a month ago and I couldn’t be happier. I don’t exacally know where I will end up but I know that it will all work out. Life is about living and we really can live the life we want once we decide to.
That’s awesome Lindsay. At the end of the day, there’s no real certainty in life. Sometimes we cling to what we know because it makes us feel safe but at the end of the day we can’t make it last forever. Life is impermanent. Sending you blessings wherever life may take you.
I have a big smile on my face reading your comment Shannon. Yes, I didn’t want to go back into corporate after I was made redundant either so I went walking. And yes, the deathbed test helps me know what is really important to me. Here’s to building your life’s worth and not just your bank account. Sending blessings.
Just to clarify, I wasn’t thinking in terms of limited means, I was thinking of people really struggling just to put food in their mouths and a roof over their head. And I didn’t mean that they don’t have dreams also but it may be difficult to have the energy and the means to focus on anything else if you’re in survival mode.
Is not the traditional path taken by many people in life to go to school, go to uni, get married, buy a house, have kids? That is all I mean by conventional and I’ve done part of that but not all of that because I have felt called in another direction. It’s the path I started down because I hadn’t really thought about what I wanted to do with my life and that’s just what I thought you do. May I end up back down that path one day? Maybe, if I feel called in that direction I would but not at the moment. If having the job and the family is what you want for your life and brings you joy and everything else you want I think that is awesome.
When I use the term safe, I mean in terms of what feels safe and comfortable to me personally. What feels safe to me doesn’t necessarily feel safe to someone else. The safe path for me would have been to keep pursuing my career because that was within my comfort zone – something I know I can do well and I would know where the money is coming from. But for me, I’ve needed to experience and lean into uncertainty to learn how life is going to support me.
I think you’ve expressed this really well Jordan.
Thanks Regina. You’ve expressed that really well.
I had a similar experience Jordan. I always loved writing as a child and teenager. I stopped writing regularly in my early twenties and one of the reasons was why put your time into something that no-one is ever going to read, isn’t that a waste of time? I blogged regularly as I travelled. Sometimes few people read the posts but I still blogged for me because I loved doing it and expressing myself.
I just loved this article … and it was very timely. I left a high paying career a few years ago to pursue a coaching business and I’m still sort of figuring out what I really want to do. I actually started a blog this year, When I Grow Up, to help me figure things out. Not knowing and not earning an income is very scary. Thank you for helping me see that all is not lost and to keep following my heart. Good luck to you on your wonderful adventure!
Oh yes Jennifer it can be so very scary but fear can be irrational and like everything it passes. They say movement builds momentum and ready, fire, aim – You can refine and recreate your vision for your life as you go. Many blessings to you as you figure it all out.
Wow, you are really brave & your story is pretty inspiring… Thank you for sharing. I wish, I was brave enough to get out of my anxieties & be able to do the same thing…:p
Thank you Jeevan. I believe courage is a muscle we can grow by taking small steps out of our comfort zone until we have the confidence and faith to take a bigger leap. I also suspect you are braver than you give yourself credit for. As Mary Anne Radmacher says, “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I’ll try again tomorrow.” Wishing you much courage.