Search Results for "comparison" — 232 posts

Comparison is waste of energy. Every individual is unique with unique talents. Find your passion and live your best life.

Lailah Gifty Akita

Personality begins where comparison leaves off. Be unique. Be memorable. Be confident. Be proud.

Shannon L. Alder

Releasing Comparisons: No One Is Perfect and We All Deserve Love

by Kirsten Davies

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

I spent my teenage years and early twenties believing that my weight was my worth; that I had to look and be a particular way to be accepted or loved.

I lived in a negative cycle of comparing myself to everyone. I remember sitting in on one of my lectures in university, trying to work out if my lecturer was fatter or thinner than me.

I look back now and wonder how many times I missed the fun and parties I was too scared to go to because I felt too …

How to Use Comparisons for Growth Instead of Feeling Inferior

by Hannah Braime

“The heart is like a garden: it can grow compassion or fear, resentment or love. What seeds will you plant there?” ~Jack Kornfield

Comparison is something we all struggle with at one point or another. Although it’s something that conventional self-help wisdom urges us to avoid, it’s also a way of gauging where we fit in the world.

Usually, when we engage in comparison, we do so from an ego-based perspective and find ourselves (or others) lacking. This approach doesn’t benefit anyone involved, but, until recently, this was my predominant experience of comparison.

I also had the belief that healthy …

Compassionate Posting: Minimizing Social Media Comparisons

by Chris PM

“We must each lead a way of life with self-awareness and compassion, to do as much as we can. Then, whatever happens we will have no regrets.” ~Dalai Lama

If you’re anything like me, you may have a love-hate relationship with social networking.

There are so many cool facets to social networking sites, such as Facebook, but I am finding that the relative ease of information sharing with the masses and portable nature of technology bring their own set of challenges. Not a bad thing, per-se, but perhaps an invitation to practice even greater mindfulness and compassion.

Consider the title

…

5 Tips to Stop Making Comparisons and Feeling Bad About Yourself

by Sara Davies

“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel.” ~Steve Furtick

I remember one day when I was around six years old, my older brother came home from school with one of those star-shaped highlighters that had a different color on each point. I laid my eyes on it and in that moment I wanted nothing more than I wanted that highlighter.

It didn’t matter that as a six year old, I had less use for it than paper shoes in rainy weather; I just simply had to have it.

Being the …

Stopping Comparisons: Reclaim Reality and Raise Your Self-Esteem

by Anonymous

“The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel” ~Steve Furtick

Have you ever wondered when the turning point was? When did you start questioning yourself and believing you were missing something? When did you stop thinking of yourself as invincible and start noticing what others called “flaws”?

As a teenager and young adult, I struggled with severe depression and anxiety.

In my early twenties, I entered treatment for my eating disorder, a decision that proved to be life-changing in the most positive of ways.

During my second stint in treatment, I …

3 Steps to Stop Making Comparisons and Start Valuing Yourself

by Margie Beiswanger

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.” ~E.E. Cummings

It seems like everywhere I look, I don’t measure up.

I was giving a presentation recently and noticed that several people seemed bored or distracted. I looked around the room to gauge my audience’s response to something I said and found myself thinking, “Am I good enough? Am I providing what this group needs?”

Suddenly, I felt sure that another, more talented presenter would have done a better job.

Later, with a friend, casually flipping through old photos, we both lamented that we were younger and …

How I Found Confidence and a New Path When I Felt Inadequate

by Kai

“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” ~Arthur Ashe

It was a quiet evening at Boat Quay. The sun was setting, casting warm golden hues over the water, and the air smelled faintly of salt and street food. I was sitting on the riverbank with a close friend, my head heavy with thoughts that refused to settle.

“I’m thirty,” I said, breaking the silence. My voice quivered with frustration. “I haven’t achieved anything. Look at Joseph Schooling—he’s younger than me and a gold medalist! My other friend started his own business. And me? I’m just… …

Releasing Self-Sabotage: 3 Simple Ways to Catch Yourself and Redirect

by Amanda Popovski

“The greater part of human pain is unnecessary. It is self-created as long as the unobserved mind runs your life.” ~Eckhart Tolle

“Holy shirtballs!” I yelped and leapt out of the ice-cold water stream, gasping for air.

There I was in an Argentina hotel at 5:30 a.m., bleary-eyed and sleep-deprived, with no chances of hot water and a back that felt like the surface of the sun.

I had gotten the worst sunburn of my LIFE the day before from laying on my belly, deeply absorbed in my first self-help book. I couldn’t believe that other people out there were …

How to Ease Anxiety and PTSD: 3 Somatic Exercises to Try

by Brianna Anderson

“The body knows how to heal. It just needs the proper conditions.” ~Peter Levine

After ten major reconstructive hip surgeries and almost six cumulative years in a full body cast, I emerged from childhood into my teenage years. My start in life was quite different from those around me. My body would never be like everyone else’s, and I was living in the aftermath of trauma.

I not only had a slew of trauma symptoms but was also deeply wrestling with my identity and had massive amounts of shame, depression, and social anxiety. As you can imagine, I had a …

Why I Stopped Measuring My Pain Against Others’ Suffering

by Natasha Ramlall

“A history of trauma can give you a high tolerance for emotional pain. But just because you can take it doesn’t mean you have to.” ~Dr. Thema

I just returned from a walk with a dear friend—one of my favorite ways to catch up and socialize. This particular friend has endured significant challenges, especially over the past year. She faced the immense loss of her pets and many of her possessions in a devastating house fire.

The ensuing tsunami of grief and pain pushed her through a tumultuous year filled with deep suffering and intense healing efforts. All the while, …

5 Practical Tips for Overcoming the Pressure to Do More

by Krystal Rosa

“In the midst of movement and chaos, keep stillness inside of you.” ~Deepak Chopra

There was a time in my life when chaos seemed to have the upper hand. I tried so hard to keep things together, but it felt like the more I tried to control things, the more they spiraled. I had goals and dreams, sure, but the stress of not being “there” yet always consumed me.

I remember one night sitting on the edge of my bed, feeling completely drained. I’d just had a tough conversation with a close friend, one of those exchanges where every word …

The Art of Being Flawed in a Perfectionist World

by Kalyani Abhyankar

“Perfection is not attainable, but if we chase perfection, we can catch excellence.” ~Vince Lombardi

Okay, let’s be real for a second. As I sit here trying to write this perfect essay about embracing imperfection, the irony isn’t lost on me. I’ve rewritten this opening paragraph about five times now. Old habits die hard, right?

Picture this: It’s 2:37 p.m. on a Wednesday afternoon. I’m pacing the lecture hall, watching my law students furiously scribbling away at their exam papers. Their furrowed brows and white-knuckle grips on their pens remind me of, well, me, not too long ago.

Flashback to …

The Breakthrough That Helped Me Stop Comparing Myself to Others

by Rebecca Stambridge

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” ~Theodore Roosevelt

In March 2020, the UK went into its first Covid lockdown, and the country was swept with anxiety and sadness. When would we see our loved ones again? Would our health be okay? Was my job safe? And more pressingly, how the heck was I expected to teach my kids?

Along with everyone else, I first received the news with a sense of impending doom and tried to make the best of a bizarre situation. “Normal life” consisted of stressful home schooling, online working, mask wearing, and (in the UK at least) …

6 Mindset Shifts to Overcome the Need for External Validation

by John Emmanuel

“Relying on external validation to understand your worth is not sustainable. If you depend on people to build you up, you also give them the same power to break you down. You are worthy regardless of their opinion.” ~Unknown

In my heart of hearts, I knew I wasn’t supposed to rely on others for validation. Yet, for the longest time, I found myself seeking external approval to define my worth.

I was constantly seeking reassurance from friends, family, and even strangers. Their validation became the measure of my self-esteem, leaving me trapped in a cycle of doubt and insecurity.…

8 Compelling Reasons to Adopt a Whole Food Diet

by Kylee Lubis

“The food you eat can be either the safest and most powerful form of medicine or the slowest form of poison.” ~Ann Wigmore

Why aren’t we taught optimal nutrition in school as adolescents?

I remember briefly learning about the food pyramid, which doesn’t even include water, by the way.

Do you want to know what I vividly remember? Growing up during the peak of diet culture, when models and actresses who were unrealistically skinny were the only ones who were considered pretty or good enough.

My dad died from a heart attack at age forty, and my single mother …

Why You Don’t Need Many Friends to Be Happy

by Sophie Clarke

“Introversion—along with its cousins sensitivity, seriousness, and shyness—is now a second-class personality trait, somewhere between a disappointment and a pathology.” ~Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking

I’ll be honest, I don’t have many friends.

And it’s something I’ve always felt a level of shame about.

In fact, I recognize it’s a self-limiting belief I’ve been carrying around since secondary school: I don’t make friends easily or have a big circle; therefore, I’m unworthy or there’s something wrong with me.

That’s not to say I’ve never had friends. I’ve had friends from childhood …

19 Things to Start Doing for Yourself in the New Year

by Maria Stenvinkel

“And suddenly you know… it’s time to start something new and trust the magic of new beginnings.” ~Meister Eckhart

Did you know that 80% of New Year’s resolutions fail?

That’s pretty crazy. Maybe you’re part of that statistic. Feeling eager, excited, and ready for change only to fall back into old patterns after a few weeks.

This was me, year after year—striving for change but not managing to pull it through, but not last year.

A few days ago I found a letter I had written to myself on New Year’s Eve in 2016, describing how I wanted 2017 to …