i have been working on a list of beliefs etc that weigh me down. one is the belief that an extended family member does not care to have a relationship with me. possibly does not even like me. this i have found to be very hurtful but i have managed to identify the belief, reflect on the source of it and find some positives. i am just not sure how i create a change and stop the negative thoughts – i am expected to have a relationship with this person. and it is a relation by marriage so any effort i make to distance myself seems to create friction with the family members who love and care about this family member. as an example, i had a number of people over for dinner and did not invite the family member who i have the strained relationship with. however ended up being made to feel that this was not a good behavior.
but i feel like if i am going to get past the hurt i need to move on and put this relationship in the past. any suggestions?