I’m glad you posted. I have certainly felt the same in the past so I think I understand what you are going through.

If you want to learn more about why you get anxious and he tends to disappear then I recommend the book Attached: The science of adult attachment.

This helped me get a lot of great perspective and feel much better. As far as letting him go. Week that sounds difficult because it’s more what he represents to you that you have to let go and have faith that it will come to you again in the future (Hopefully as someone more reliable)

The second thing that can help is being less reliant on the actions and reactions of others when judging yourself. Easier said than done. A great book for this is The Four Agreements. Read those two books and you will be well on your way to feeling a whole lot better.

I wish you the best.

Dear Dana,

Thanks for sharing your story. I’m convinced this is the first step :o)

I sincerely believe that the first step to overcome a great disappointment is to let the feelings out. Speak to people and you’ll feel a lot better because all of a sudden you are putting things in perspective instead of dealing with the difficulties alone.

I’ve been through similar situations and I can emphasize how much it has helped me. Also, I’d like you to realize that you are in a great position at the moment. You have learned what you’re looking for and what you’re not looking for :o)

Write down your thoughts or talk to people you trust – I believe those are your keywords :o)

Best,
Anders Hasselstrøm
Motivational Speaker