Cyd,

It makes sense to me why you’d reach out to your ex to share happy moments. Sometimes when we get excited, we want to share that excitement with others. However, where to go next is really up to you. Your post was a little lacking in some details that would help aim, but a few possibilities that come to heart are:

If you wish to maintain a friendship with the ex, but still feel uncomfortable because of your history, consider spending some time wishing her happiness. By wishing that she finds joy on her path, you naturally let go of the icky memories and feelings. Consider “Sharon Salzburg guided metta meditation” for an example of a loving kindness meditation, which helps to grow that well wishing.

If you want different people to share happy moments with, consider exploring some local groups that share intrests with you. Often times we can find like minded people that share at least one interest with us, and often more. Perhaps get out there and shake some hands! Friends sometimes just fall into our life, but many times we have to find them.

If you have a lot of friends, but just don’t feel like you’re close enough to them to open up and share those moments with, consider giving it a try. Often times our friends have the same hesitation to be heartfelt, and it takes a jump of courage to break the ice.

Feel free to ignore or reject anything that doesn’t fit, or write back with whatever details seem important to you. Good luck!

With warmth,
Matt