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  • July 17, 2013 at 4:04 pm #38828
    Matt
    Participant

    Rm056789,

    Is that your real name? No wonder you’ve been robotic in action if you were named so! 🙂

    It sound like you’re experiencing burnout. If you’re 3 years into a PhD, you’re not that far from being a Doctor. This will give a lot of freedom to you! Is there really no career or life path that the PhD relates to that you would enjoy doing?

    Do you self-nurture? Sometimes when we are overly stressed, we feel we are on autopilot and everything becomes a chore. Its possible that you’re just in the wrong place, but it is also possible your stress is turning everything you’re doing into a painful experience. The solution varies per individual, but sometimes all we need to do is remember how to play.

    One Zen trick is to get in front of a mirror and act goofy. Cluck like a chicken, wave your arms around, speak nonsense and look at how ridiculous you are! We forget sometimes how playful life can be, and we knit our brows and become sooo serious. There’s a kid in there under the numbers, and perhaps that kid needs a little space to play. 🙂

    Here’s a joke:
    A student walks into a monetary and approaches the master. “If I join your sangha, how long until I become enlightened?”

    “Ten years” the master says.

    “What if I double my efforts and work really hard?”

    “Twenty years.”

    With warmth,
    Matt

    July 18, 2013 at 8:49 am #38848
    Crissy
    Participant

    Dearest RM,
    I do not have any advise to offer as far as breaking the news to your parents about leaving school but ask yourself this: Are you really here, in this beautiful galaxy of ours, where us humans are a miracle, nearly an impossibility; Just to do something that makes you miserable? Life is a gift!
    Look within yourself, the answers are there. I know that doesn’t sound comforting but it should! You already have all the answers!
    I can totally relate though!
    I went to school on scholarship only to realize that school was SOOO not for me. So what happened? Because I didn’t finish I had to pay back the money I had used, which was like $20,000. And my father is only supportive in the same way your parents are. But I was so miserable and so fed up that I just jumped. I quit. I thought my father would be so pissed since he was the one who would have to pay for it (he tends to have a nasty temper) but it ended up being all good!
    I’m sure your parents don’t want you to be miserable so I say just jump. What’s the worst that will happen? My dad was sore at me for a bit but you know what? I was much happier in the end.
    I wouldn’t normally tell someone to just quit what they’re doing but I feel that everyone should follow their bliss. This is the best thing you can do for yourself and for the rest of the world. Maybe you don’t know what you want to do but you DO know what you DON’T want to do.
    What Matt is saying is very good too, good reminder and good questions to ask yourself. I’m sure there is a lot you can do with a PhD. And if you ever want to live and work in a foreign country it won’t be hard for you with a PhD.
    Love and light
    Crissy

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