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Uncertainty about a friend

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  • November 6, 2013 at 10:29 pm #44941
    Hee
    Participant

    Hello Anei,

    Congrats on your first post! You seem like a very good hearted person, and you do care about this friend of yours. I think everything is just situation in life. Sometimes I see that situations direct what happens. If you happen to be at the right moment with this semi-acquantice at the right time, with the right motives, and the right environment your expression of feelings may come to him naturally. It’s usually trying to force things to happen leads to many stressful events and getting your feelings expressed in ways you didn’t want to have it expressed in my experience. I see that you have 2 months stay before you leave, and he’s working all the time which means timing may not be all too perfect, but it’s kind of like that for most people. Get your feelings expressed to him naturally and there’s nothing you need to worry about! Your heart is strong… with time, I’m sure the right situation would be presented to you and your feelings would be expressed in the way you want to have it expressed. Be sincere about your feelings, so you can receive that sincere feeling back to you.

    Namaste…

    🙂

    November 7, 2013 at 4:46 am #44945
    Karin
    Participant

    Hi Anei,

    When you open your heart for love, you also open it for pain. But when your heart is open, when you risk that pain, lovely things can happen. Scary though.
    I guess there are 2 things you can do:

    1 – nothing, you keep it as it is. He is your friend, you have your feelings and you don’t say anything about them. The plus-side is: you can keep hoping that something might happen, that he falls in love with you also. And your heart is relatively safe. If you decide to do nothing, your feelings won’t magically disappear, but you can choose to leave them as they are. Maybe you can even enjoy the excitement. You probably feel these things in your body somewhere – when you notice it’s there, just say (in your head) ‘i feel this and that and that’s ok.’ You’re not ignoring your feelings, you’re just letting them be.

    2 – you boldly confess your feelings for him. The worst that can happen is that he doesn’t share your feelings. Your hope will be shattered and your heart may be broken. It’s risky business, but it would also mean being able to move on with your life and focusing your attention on other things. I can’t imagine a real friend would turn his back on you in this case to be honest, all though it may be a little uncomfortable for a while – I guess that’s also partly how you yourself deal with what happens.
    Of course there is also that lovely chance that he feels the same way about you… and since you seem like such a kind, aware person that is not at all unlikely! I think that if you decide to take this road that, before you actually tell him, it’s good to focus on a positive outcome – don’t let fear rule your thoughts. You’re inner strength will be there to catch you if you should fall.

    I guess what you have to decide is whether this is worth risking a broken heart over. Whether you just want to keep the hope alive, or move forward in your life. Maybe you should just ask your heart. Sounds silly, but that’s what i sometimes do. I’ll just say: heart, what would you do? Funny how I often get an answer that surprises me.

    I wish you lots of strength and love, Anei 🙂

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