Dear Lacy:

This is what I figure, imagining I am in your place:

This person I work for, I expect him to give a potential employer of mine (when I look for another job) a negative review. He is most likely to throw in the same *%%$ he criticized me for. Doesn’t matter how hard and well I work for him, his expressed evaluation of me and my work to a new employer is likely to be negative. So expecting anything different is unrealistic.

There is one thing going for me with this person: I have some necessary skills no one else in the office has and this person does not have the money or is not willing to pay to bring in someone new to perform these skills. He is interested in me because I have these skills and I am working for a pay he is comfortable with. This means that I can assert myself with him successfully because he doesn’t want to pay someone else more and he doesn’t want the hassle of finding a new employee.

So I would go into the office, take him aside (or not) and tell him like-it-is. Or I would wait till he says what he says and then tell him like-it-is, what you want from him, the changes you want him to make in his behavior in the office!

What do you have to lose? You have a whole lot more to win than to lose, I think. You can earn his respect as bullies do respect strength, they often back away.

anita