Hi, my name is Mia, 20 years old. Growing up my life was planned and guided by my parents, which I am okay with, I didn’t know what else would make better sense. The bringing up was strict, I was provided with sufficient necessities, but what lacked was physical affection from family. I haven’t hug my parents for years, because no one does that at home. Since high school, my mother stopped guiding and checking up on me, she said I should be independent enough to live a life, and so her focus shifted towards my younger sister. At first it was hard, every decision, planning which step had to be taken next, I’m all by myself. Later, I grew to love this freedom, as long as I showed them good grades, they would be satisfied. I had dreams, living life with passion and positive drive. Along the way, there were many times where my parents would interfere, I enjoyed debating but they were least supportive, every single debate practice felt like mission impossible, I had to fight so hard to convince mother for a ride. I enjoyed martial arts but they disagreed too. All these episodes of disapproval left me devastated, not to mention the insults and scoldings I get. Crying became an essential before sleeping every night, my self esteem and confidence were drowned. Finally, I left home for junior’s college. That was a relief from the negative environment at home. Met good friends and teachers who were hands down supportive. I was happy, but something wasn’t right deep down. Until now, I feel lonely, empty and hopeless. The passion and drive I used to have were gone. Nothing seems to interest me anymore. Stepping into university, I found the significant other, he is full of life and passion, I never felt so much hope around someone, his vibe sparked the long lost passion and positive drive in me. Soon I decided to tell my parents about him, to share my happiness with them. That was where things went down to the drain. He is of different race and religion than me, my parents couldn’t accept that. I was lectured everyday since then, with humiliation. They made it clear that I should cut all connections with him immediately. I didn’t give up, things are well between us, we are still strong together until today, without my parents’ acknowledgement. Unfortunately, things aren’t well at home. I am overly observed, to cover things up I have to lie a lot, the more I lie, the more I feel guilty and against myself. That emptiness is crawling back again, worse, lethargy and hopeless engulfed me all day, I lost focus on daily routines with minimal interests and suicidal thoughts. At home, I feel really lost and helpless, this is suffocating, what can I do to at least find a meaning to live?