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The Pain Body

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  • November 12, 2015 at 5:58 pm #87296
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Jack:

    In real life it mean those neuropathways in our brains that bring us distress and lead us to ineffective behaviors. Example of an effective, constructive neuropathways are those responsible for dear Jack tying his shoes. An example of ineffective, destructive neuropathways are those responsible to the hypervigilance you described in the coffee shop and leaving as a result.

    The neuropathways, that is the millions connections between neurons are interconnected to muscles and hormonal glands etc. Hence, the body.

    anita

    November 12, 2015 at 6:03 pm #87297
    Anonymous
    Guest

    * Jack: I am thinking I may be posting way too much on the forum. I am thinking of taking a break or lowering my participation (My inner critic is cheering, telling me lots of people here are cheering…) – I am starting to annoy myself a bit answering every question and so quickly… what do you think?
    anita

    November 12, 2015 at 6:14 pm #87301
    jock
    Participant

    the problem being anita, that there will be a big hole for the rest of us. what ever decision, do it for yourself anyway

    November 12, 2015 at 6:17 pm #87302
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Oh, okay, Jack. My inner critic (neuropathways) was telling me even you are tired of my posts…not so? You are not?
    anita

    November 12, 2015 at 6:32 pm #87304
    jock
    Participant

    Actually Anita, I for one would love for you to start a thread talking in detail about your story, in particular your therapy story. It seems to me that you are now using what you learned in therapy to help others. I mean you seem to use a Freudian approach mixed with NLP. I could be talking hogwash here but anyway your story seems to be one of the real success stories that is not only inspirational and courageous but also fascinating in the detail.
    Too personal?

    • This reply was modified 9 years, 5 months ago by jock.
    November 12, 2015 at 6:45 pm #87306
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Jack:

    There is so much to my story, to the story of my therapy alone. I have thick binders with my writings. It is a fascinating, ongoing process that I have been sharing bits and pieces here. Therapy with my ex therapist and afterward has been ONE TOPIC then the other, and the third, then going back to the first and seeing MORE in it, and the fourth and second, seeing more and so on and so on. It is amazing how many levels of KNOWING there are on one topic. There is a superficial knowing and there is a deep emotional knowing. This is hard to share. Also the process is very precious. Some personal things are personal. Too personal. Oh, I guess you are right, some things are indeed too personal.

    How have you been doing Jack? Anything new with public speaking, hypervigilance otherwise?

    anita

    November 12, 2015 at 7:01 pm #87307
    jock
    Participant

    hate to admit I am one who really needs some therapy but I do… 🙂
    [I need a job but I don’t have the confidence or motivation to work any more.]
    There I said it. Whew. I’m ashamed of that statement and I’m not sure I really mean it either.
    I’m starting to lose hope actually. Life is good right now but if I don’t do something soon, I will be lining up at the homeless soup kitchen one day.
    I exercise daily and meditate and try to read up on gurus like Tolle. I’ve cut back on crap food.
    I’m ashamed to write all this but maybe I need to admit I’m struggling. I’d give myself a D minus for 2015. Look I don’t want a tsunami of support. It’s up to me this. I have to grow up before I turn 60. There you go…57 and I still haven’t worked it all out. I’m f***ed. oops, got to watch the vocab. on Tiny Buddha.
    this is a crap post so you may want to disregard. I’m rambling

    • This reply was modified 9 years, 5 months ago by jock.
    • This reply was modified 9 years, 5 months ago by jock.
    November 12, 2015 at 7:45 pm #87310
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Jack:

    I just analyzed you free of charge for over half an hour and deleted it all. I didn’t sleep last night. I believe I see what it is that you need to see to make your person and your life so much better, but like I wrote above, there are all levels of knowing and even if you do not object to what I wrote and deleted, the superficial level of knowing is not going to make any difference for you. For you to see yourself as valuable and OKAY no matter your age, this takes work and time and courage and help from a qualified other. To know-know-know. And I can see how that could be happening, the process because I am in it myself and know first hand how it feels and what it takes to change a core belief about self worth… it was only recently that I felt warmth toward myself. So you read about self compassion and know this or that, but to FEEL it, that what it takes to SEE it in a level that becomes a belief. Can’t make it happen in a message like this one. I told you I see you that way, but how can I transfer it to you?

    I was extremely difficult on myself, about my age, comparing myself to others- always to my disadvantage. And now, I feel so much better even when I don’t sleep all night (physical discomfort is the reason, digestive like). So here it is POSSIBLE, DOABLE. And yet as much as I want to, I can’t pass it on to you.

    This is why I deleted what I wrote. I like you, Jack. You, of all the people here on the forum, are the most special to me by far. And you stood up for me, I will not forget that! With your fears and all, you had the incredible courage to stand up to criticism, nasty remarks by others and you stood by me. In my life experience, it is a very, very special person that does that, for me.

    I wish. I wish I could make a difference for you right now. I wish you were not ashamed of anything at all. I wish you were okay with your age and everything else. I am glad you exercise and eat better and meditate, please continue.

    If you would like to… if you would like to experiment with me, doing an online therapy-like thing here,,,I never did that before. I am not a professional of any kind. But as one who is in the process, if you’d like to correspond here, this may very well be crazy. I am rambling now. If you have any idea about how I can help you with the therapy I had and keep doing, let me know. I just thought of deleting this as well. Okay, better submit, submit, submit.

    anita

    November 12, 2015 at 7:56 pm #87311
    Anonymous
    Guest

    * I mean, if you would like me to start a thread of you and I corresponding therapy like, for the purpose of maybe, maybe, maybe me being of help to you… this would be so controversial because I am not a therapist…let me know. We can make the rules, knowing this is public. Others could post in it, and it must be allowed because it is a public forum. Now, I am going to bed. I hope I can sleep and hope to have a fresh brain in the morning. Think about it= this is an unbaked idea. Take care, anita

    November 12, 2015 at 8:32 pm #87315
    jock
    Participant

    Unbaked 🙂

    OK mmm thanks Anita. I’m not sure I want to put all my dirty laundry on here but well…think about it….

    Hey I appreciate the fact that you restore feelings of self-worth in me. That is sensational come to think of it. Even I write something stupid or you write something critical of me, it can all be in context that we have established some trust, some credibility between us already.
    Unconditional acceptance is beyond most human beings but won’t hurt trying.

    November 12, 2015 at 8:36 pm #87316
    jock
    Participant

    Anita
    Would you say you have achieved unconditional self-acceptance?

    November 13, 2015 at 12:49 am #87327
    Dernell
    Participant

    I think” that the Pain Body” could have multiple meanings:

    first thing that comes to mind, is the struggle” of ones life” course in order to better the psyche” for the body”.
    ( like the saying, no pain “… no gain” )

    second: WHEN we put our selves in distressing” moments, our body goes through physical” and emotional” deterioration”.

    last: could be, the troublesome” of the world” and body” portraying” all of us as a one”…

    November 13, 2015 at 12:51 am #87328
    Dernell
    Participant

    don’t know, and now I have a new book to read up on!

    November 13, 2015 at 1:39 am #87329
    jock
    Participant

    Power of Now or New Earth I recommend.
    Tolle is a brilliant educator really. He explains things so well, his writing skills and intelligence the key to his success.
    I am in awe of his insights. If there is one criticism of him, it is his public speaking ability. he tends to be monotone. But his writing..wow!
    Tolle says that thinking is the problem. We get obsessive about “content” when we should be focussing on “space”. Aim for going beyond conscious thinking. Go deeper, deeper (anita you said that too I know).
    The shortcut would be to take good drugs. (LSD?)… 🙂 Sorry Tiny Buddha, I was only joking.

    November 13, 2015 at 7:33 am #87335
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Jack:

    I woke up at five am or so and my brain started percolating as to how I was going to therapeut you, ha ha… ha. As to your question if I achieved unconditional self acceptance- my answer: I know-know-know what self acceptance means. I heard it many times before, of course, decades ago, that is the kind of superficial knowing, the kind of knowing that made no difference in my life. Now I know it on a deeper level, the kind that is making a difference in my life: it is much, much more peaceful a place in between my ears and I can SEE better and better into me and outside me.

    As far as the unbaked idea: you hit the nail on the head with what we do need to have if we were to go about it, to experiment: trust. I trust you and you trust me- do you? You know I am a real person? You do know I have your (and mine of course) well being in heart and mind, that I am on your side? Do you trust that I have something to give you, that what I write to you I will not write to you if I think it will be taken with a grain of salt just because it is online, not in physical presence?

    There is that. And then, if we were to go about it, it will be a no BS therapy experiment. My position will be someone equal to you with more experience walking the path of healing and evolving. Not a therapist. Not superior to you in value or intelligence or anything but this one point: more experience walking the healing path.

    Either one of us can stop at any time, with an explanation and honest input, of course. It must be completely honest although not ALL dirty laundry is requited to be aired; this is not Confession time. But everything that is shared must be real and true.

    Always respect between us regardless of feelings rising, such as anger and objection and disagreement. Always ask before assuming: what did you mean by this? Think, for example: anita wants my best. This or that sounds like she is negatively criticizing me and it hurts, I will ask her what she meant by this, maybe I am missing something.

    Always, of course, rely on your own thinking and evaluate what I write, I am no guru (who should never be followed blindly, no matter who what etc).

    Thoughts… toward starting a what shall we call it thread?

    anita

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