Hi!

I didn’t read “The Secret” and I honestly have minimal knowledge about the Law of Attraction, but I just wanted to butt in and give my 2 cents on the topic regarding, positive vs. negative thinking…

Lately I’ve been reading a book called “The Happiness Trap” by Russ Harris. It’s about “acceptance and commitment therapy”; one of my counselors recommended it to me. I hesitated to read it because the premise is about accepting every thought and feeling you have; even the negative ones, instead of trying to ignore them, because the more you ignore them, the stronger they get in the background. Instead of dwelling on thoughts, beliefs, and feelings, he encourages people to carry on with their lives regardless of how their minds are thinking or feeling. Eg.- I get anxious a lot, and sometimes that makes me not want to get up and go to dance auditions; but since my anxiety is rooted in worries about the future, it try to root myself in the present moment and just continue with what I was doing. The anxiety is still there, but instead of trying to make it go away, I acknowledge it, rate it, etc, then carry on. Believe me, it’s really hard…

I think the best thing to take away from “The Happiness Trap”, is that it’s not always about positive thinking and blocking negative thoughts. People are always going to have negative experiences. It’s human! It’s about just being able to go through your life without the background noise of constant thoughts. It’s more about fully living in the moment, which I like because it takes the emphasis off the “think positive!!!” theory which I tend to find…exhausting and artificial at times. Not sure what you guys think about this book or the author’s ideas, but I recommend it!

Hello Joe,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Actually,I find the secret book is too logical.
We are humanbeings with too many features.
I think we can do alot of incredible things through our minds.
Anyway,regardless to every sentence written in this book. I think you should enjoy every moment in your life despite of terrible events,..people.
It’s all how we think .
When you feel joyful without worrying about problems your life will be better.
I live in an under develop country where there is a war. There are alot of difficulties in our life . I faced many terrible events before I rwatch the secret movie.
I do not mention that my life now is amazing but I think it is too better.
Nowdays, I am planing to travel to Germany and continue my study in Germany.
I dream about meeting new friends from all the world. I believe that oneday I will meet my true love who seems like Mattew Lewis.
I live now in my beliefs and I am satisfy that all of them will be true

Hello,

It’s been years since I first saw ‘the Secret’, and at that time I was fascinated by it..But it’s normal I guess when someone gives you ‘quick and easy fix’ for all your problems. I also ‘believe’ in crystals, feng shui And though I believe such thing exists, I know that it doesn’t just work that way.

1) You can’t fool your mind, it knows!! Wishful thinking and attempt to trick your mind is not the fix. You can’t trick your mind… really! You can cut all the wonderful houses and frame them on your wall, tell yourself in the mirror thousand times a day positive things.. but then the bills come, chance for vacation you can’t afford. You know the truth deep down. And it brings you bad mood. And it brings you guilt knowing bad mood brings more bad energy. And guilt is the worst feeling of all.

2) Will the things you wish for make you happy? You know, I wanted my apartment, I wanted to travel, to work as an artist years ago. Well, it happened…lol 🙂 Even for a while I lived in a house in nature just like the houses I had printed and hanged on the wall in my room. And now I am trashing the book, ha? lol :)But I know for a fact that life is such a journey that it’s not always meant to be pleasant. And sometime the best changes come through those hard days, and it wasn’t our living arrangement that made us unhappy. It was our fears and limitations in the mind. When I got these things I wished for(not so long ago), I had to fight the most terrible case of panic disorder and anxiety, and I still deal with it (getting better luckily). I barely notice the beauty around me now I wanted so much. I just wanna get well, and focus all my energy around it. But I have learnt so much from this situation. Walls and places and buildings are just walls and places and buildings. For me, true happiness is good health and positive people in your surrounding, peace (I’ve lived through war), and often we take these things for granted. And every win over our fears and limitations gives us new layer of confidence, that we can make it, we can handle life, we can get better, we’ll manage through hardship. That’s when we don’t fool our mind, our mind knows we’ll make it, cause we’ve done that before.

3) What I believe in these last years is that every person, every emotion has it’s own vibration (energy, frequency). I think that our goal is to raise from those ‘low’ energies to the higher ones.. It’s not yet an exact science, but yes, they can be measured, and they have been. I believe the law of attraction works through this vibrational way, we resonate to the frequency we emit through our emotions. And there are many ways to ‘raise’ your vibration that include spiritual practice, choosing the right food even, the right way of thinking. Maybe you won’t get Ferrari, but you’ll find peace. And these ways have been known for centuries (isn’t it amazing that temples in different religions use sounds-like chimes and bells or prayers, and burn herbs inside for some reason? ). It’s another topic though, not for here maybe 🙂

But exploiting the vibrational nature of Law of attraction, commercializing it in a way that it will bring you house and car, and these things will make you happy.. It’s questionable. But yes, the Secret is a good stepping stone to realize that there is something more out there..

I also think it’s a good starting point to practice positive thinking through gratitude. Just acknowledge all the wonderful things and people you have in your life, talk about things that bring out the best in you. Help people. Whenever you feel like complaining, shift to one of these things.. It takes time and practice, I am on that road too, but I know it can’t hurt you 🙂

Ah yes, the law of attraction. Remember that old song by Janice Joplin “Lord won’t you buy me a Mercedes Benz?” Remember what happened to Janice Joplin… death by heroin OD isn’t pretty.

Look… Shaq could hope, wish, dream, fantasize about being a Triple Crown winning jockey. Um, yeah, um. That Triple Crown winning jockey could spend all day daydreaming about being a starting NBC center, with about as much success.

If wishin and a hopin were enough, there would be no need for doing any actual work. (Sorry, on an oldies kick this early morning/late night). Might as well just go and buy a lottery ticket.

Figuring out what you want is only half of the battle. You have to be willing to work to go after what you want. When you start working on what you want, you sometimes bring forces into play that you cannot explain; forces that do not awaken when you fail to start working. You might think this is callous, but I’ll explain.

About 10 years ago, I was more-or-less down and out. I had a bachelor’s, master’s, and juris doctorate degrees. I won’t go into the specifics as to how I found myself pseudo-employed (let’s just say I could be an a** at times plus tended to have victimization issues, and still suffer from that at times), but I decided to do things differently. I initially set modest income and asset goals, and started to force myself into action, and worked whatever jobs I could find while looking for something in my field.

After about two years, found opportunity ~2,600 miles from home in a state I had never been to before, in a far corner of that state, in a place that my fellow law school acquaintances laughed it, in a place that I could never convince folks from any of my alma maters to come to. Started out at over my initial income goal, and after getting some debts paid down and getting things started up, I began saving ~15-20% off the top. You’d be amazed at how quickly money adds up. I reconfigured my goals, and continued to work at things.

Did I get some financial good fortune along the way? Yes. My father’s uncle died to a traffic crash about 3 years ago. My father and mother had divorced when I was a baby, and no matter what I did, it just wasn’t good enough for him. My father followed his uncle in death less than a year later. That was a significant financial benefit, as my father had not had time to squander his inheritance on booze, cigars, etc. However, I did not stop working; I did not stop saving 15-20% of my income.

Ultimately, the only practical way to get what you really want is to go out and go after it. If you want financial independence, set objectives, and work toward those objectives. Treat the unexpected gifts with reverence, and use them wisely.