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The Enemy Within You………….

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  • April 13, 2013 at 5:09 pm #33792
    Alexander Kazoo
    Participant

    I always have this trouble…

    I have 20 years old and right now i’m in the third year of college.  Until this moment, I thought that I was doing well in my life. Always having really good grades, a group of friends, a family that always supported me, no economic or health problems…Hell, even a lot of people think I’m a cool and handsome guy.

    As today, nothing of that has changed. Only me. I have become more anxious and I’m always at the verge of tears. I cry for no reason at all. My head is always so full of thoughts that I cant enjoy the present moment without having those little annoying conversations in my head. Always telling me the worst, always speaking shit about me, always fearing. I have even become fearful of my friends. Friends that always loved me back and have never ever betrayed me. I  dont understand what is happening to me…

    I would love to see myself in the mirror and smiling once again.  But I can’t. It doesnt matter how many people have tried to tell me that everything is fine, that I’m not a bad person, etc.

    My life is perfect.But I cant enjoy it anymore. I don’t even like myself. But people love me anyway. I dont get it.

    I am my worst enemy. Always throwing junk at myself and robbing the  joy and laughter from life.

    April 18, 2013 at 6:40 am #33987
    Aiyappa
    Participant

    Alexander, what has changed? Do you have a lot of free time to think than you had before? Or anything changed that makes you believe so?
    What I do when I have such feelings is write down each fear and each thought. One by one. And then put a “Who”, “What” and “Is it real” to each of those.
    1. Who can help
    2. What will ensure that fear or thought is addressed
    3. Is it real or a perceived fear or thought?

    Far more often than not, I have figured out my fears were just exaggerated “Ifs” and “What ifs”. If its real, I’d seek help from whoever can. A friend, a colleague, relative or a counselor.

    Are you occupied with some good reading, sports and out door activities? Trekking and hiking gave me a great relief. So did positive and motivational speeches by certain inspiring leaders in college, office and outside. Cycling and bike rides early mornings calmed me down and made me look ahead too.

    More than anything else, also write down your purpose. what do you want to do? who do you want to become? And planning for that is far more simpler than you’d think
    Cheers!

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