Dear AngryAngie:

You’ve been in a five year relationship with the father of your baby. For two years he was a stay at home dad while you worked. Now the two of you are separated: you are living with your baby at his grandparents’ home and he is living with his brother. He wants you to move to your sister’s home while he stays at his brother’s, working odd jobs while you are off work for a couple of months.

He’s been saying for a while that he “wants to work on his own identity”, “to get back to himself”, that he wants to stop being dependent on you, that he wants to be financially stable and  provide for his family, that he wants to “let the negative situation air out”, the negative air being the many arguments you had about him wanting space away from you.

“he wants to focus on working and himself… it scares me that he feels like this separation doesn’t have a timeline…. I am having a hard time accepting this separation especially since I don’t know how long and I love him and don’t want this to turn into a full blown breakup “-

– my feel is that he is stalling, buying time, that he is afraid to tell you that he already moved on. He doesn’t want the “negative air” between you and him to get even more negative once he tells you that he is done with the relationship. I may be wrong and I hope that I am wrong.

anita