Hi, I’m new to this.

I made huge changes in my life very suddenly a couple of years ago, and changed almost everything about my life. The following months were filled with extreme anxiety, obsession and anger towards a particular person. But I was also incredibly determined. I gained a new job that is a massive step up but is incredibly stressful.

That period of time has left me with something. I’ve been moving at 100 miles an hour at work for a year and a half now. I work for a start-up charity so I have no choice in that. But what I went through emotionally took its toll on me, including on my health. And it’s left me jumpy and anxious.

I have found a new home for myself, I have a room-mate again, for the first time since I was in my early 20s (12 years ago). After being in a long-term relationship where we constantly argued about domestic issues and I never felt at home this is a bliss and independence I have never had. Now that I’m in this safe space I don’t know what to do next. My ex, who I was still in contact with, has just given up on me and told me it’s over for good. I moved to a city far away, near my parents again for the first time since I was little because I couldn’t bare living 500 miles away from them any longer. I struggle so much to know where to move to because I need to be close to them. My ex and I argued constantly because we couldn’t decide how to move forward, as in how we could find a compromise on where/how to live together. I have my own place now and I don’t want to give it up. But I’m not sure I just want to give up on the relationship either.

I know these are decisions I have to make myself, and I probably need counselling to overcome emotions from my past. I just feel a bit stuck and don’t know what to do to create some movement, and step forward without being afraid I will loose everything again.