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Dear Readers,
I would like to ask for help everyone whos wiser. Ive been following the teachings and beautiful thoughts shared by people but right now i feel lost. Im in a relationship over 4 years. We fell in love in a bad time, the relationship was created with the poison of lies and lot of painful acts but we stayed together. We had some freaking amazing times but even until this very day my partner couldnt forgive me for my mistakes. She still uses the things ive done to hurt me. This hurts me and i feel unjust because ive changed and i am proud of that. And i know she will never completely forgive me, therefore i am not sure our love can ever be true and loving. We are too scarfed by each other. At the same time i think we are too attached. I wonder sometimes if im unable to let go because its true love or because im too attached to the memories and my believes that shell change and love me as i love her? Recently i joined a program to move to the USA. Shes from Asia, we have distance relationship. We meet half year and spend the rest apart. I have two choices: stay in Europe and wait and hope for this program to allow me to go or fly to her because it seems like a bigger chance? I want to be abroad, the thought of teaching children in America excites me. I feel anxious and happy and the program is positive because of my skills.being with her is right nowseems more comfortable, i can take it for granted. But i know that she wants to move too, she wants to travel. And whenever she tells me about her future she forgets we are a couple. Part of me feels i should dream big and fight for the future i imagined. But when i think of being without her i push it away, im too weak to have the courage to want to end it. Its too much weve been through i dont know how i could let her go. At the same time thinking of letting go doesnt really mean its true live is it? I feel i deserve someone who would sacrifice as much for me as i did for her.( i dont want anyone to do it, its just ive given up a lot and ivebent a lot to please her and make me love me) but at the end of the day she says she loves me but shes not in love.
Hi olivia Hopkins
First of all i wud like to congratulate you on your success of building yourself into a person n being proud of yourself., friend im also proud of You. I think your girl frnd has her own reasons to not forgive you and keep thinking and blaming you about the things that were in past, see its an individual preference and wisdom to let go or hold on to things and in this case she is preferring to hold on.
But one thing with all my heart i want to say is that Love is about forgiving and love is about forgetting too, if we truly live somebody and see his/her efforts to be better ,this change should be appreciated and welcomed with open arms and reward of changing must be forgiveness and forgetfulness.
If i would have been at your place i would have kept loving her and at the same time would have gone after my dreams.. Coz thats my real calling
Olive if someone has to be with you he or she will make it with you . Why dont you give her a chance to miss you or think about forgetting all what happened and get over it and then cone with you. Dear go out for your dreams.,thats your purpose in life , in case you are still doubtful i would suggest be calm n think wudnt you have let her follow her dream if she had got a chance to do so ,rather than thinkng to drop the idea n staying with you.
You have done your part in this relationship you have been through everything and im sure you have grown as a wise person so move to this opportunity this will definitely open new doors in life for you. Im very hopefull if u will follow your dream,your calling you will get many things which you never imagined ever..
Go friend. Live for yourself once
I would love to knw abt your decision
Pls post it !
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