Dear celeste:

“My preference is to not be around them. Is it healthier to acknowledge this and respect my feelings- or- learn how to develop a tolerance?” –

– My answer: it is healthy to acknowledge your sensitivity, to respect it, and to avoid being around people who cause you distress for whatever reason (as long as you don’t have to interact with them, ex., in the workplace), and to not beat yourself up!

“It is almost as if my sensitivity is viewed as something bad” – your sensitivity to loud people who dominate and interrupt others in conversations is not bad. None of your automatic emotional reactions to any person or any situation is bad: you have no choice when it comes to how you.. automatically feel about this or that.

It sometimes happens though that a sensitivity changes. For example, when I moved to where I now live, I was terribly sensitive to the barking of the neighbors’ beagle. I was very distressed when I heard the barking. Fast forward, I made friends with Hunter the beagle who visited with me every day for years, and I grew to love him so much that his barking became a pleasant sound. Fast forward, Hunter the beagle died, the neighbors brought in a beagle puppy who looks like Hunter. His barking is so pleasant to my ears. (He barked a moment ago, such a strong bark for a puppy).

I don’t see how this can apply to your situation though… I suppose if (IF) you got to like one of the “Loud Obnoxious People” for some reason (if that person expresses liking you, if they shared something personal with you that caused you to feel empathy for that person, if you learned that they have a hearing problem and they are not aware of their loudness, etc.), your sensitivity to that person’s  loudness would probably lessen and maybe even be gone.

anita

Dear Celeste:

Loud and obnoxious people in the dog park… I see. Well, it’s totally fine to visit the dog park when the people that stress you out are not there!

anita