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Semi-new relationship/different religious views

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  • #36136
    Alexey Sunly
    Participant

    I am sorry, Ashley, but it sounds like you are very much judgmental. That’s why you are having such hard time with this. Religion alone does not make relationships happen, people do. Forget about religion and focus on relationships with people instead. Yes, of course, some people find connection through religion but the rest do so through many other things that matter to them. In your case, you and your boyfriend’s parents already share something in common, your boyfriend. So, you could share with them your stories about him and ask them to share theirs. Better yet, you could ask your boyfriend about his parents and their interests outside of religion. So, if his mother, for example, likes to garden and grow certain flowers you could look into that topic and buy her a gift of flower seeds. I am sure you get the idea. People are not just their religion, the car they drive or the clothes they wear. People are multidimensional beings with many interests, fears, desires. The only way to connect with them is to let go of your prejudice, keep an open mind and show a sincere interest in things and people they care about. And if they do not seem to like you, it’s not a big deal. The most important thing is that you like yourself and the person you are striving to be.

    #36378
    Mark
    Participant

    Hi Ashley. I agree with Ashley; and a couple of things come to my mind about your situation. First, it isn’t really that helpful to compare ourselves with other people and try to decide who’s ‘better’ than who. That just turns the relationship into a competition, which it shouldn’t and needn’t be. Second, we can’t do anything about other people’s manners. We hope they will treat us with acceptance and respect, but if they don’t, we can’t make them. However, we are responsible for our own behaviour and if we think it’s right to treat people courteously then we should make an effort to do that – not only if they behave well to us, and certainly not to prove that we’re ‘better’, but just because we believe it’s right to do that.
    I hope your partner’s family will respect you as his partner and will treat you well; but in any case, if you behave towards them with respect and courtesy, you will be doing good in the world and acting with compassion.
    Good luck!

    #36379
    Mark
    Participant

    Sorry – that should have read ‘I agree with ALEXEY!!!

Viewing 3 posts - 1 through 3 (of 3 total)

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