And do you really feel this self-criticism is serving you?
Do you feel that youre “happier” for all of this?

Id imagine you mean the world to somebody, will you be happy when they see you the way you see yourself?
I wouldnt want to be seen in the negative light that I have seen in myself, when I let myself self criticize and belittle myself.
It isnt always easy to let go and just BE, it is easier said than done, but we must show ourself some compassion and stop the cycle of pain and hurt that we self inflict.

Ive read somewhere, and im sure I will butcher it, but here goes it anyways.
We all have 2 voices in our head, one is our true self which is nurturing and keeps us out of harms way, keeps us safe and follows our dreams. The other voice is “that friend” who pretends to be our friend…sometimes telling us what we want to hear so we keep them close and value their opinion…but says THE worst things to us about ourselves and makes us feel badly.
But only one voice is needed…make the choice, listen to yourself and not “that friend”…YOU DONT NEED THEM ANYWAYS!

Mediitation is an excellent way to silence “that friend” and it gives your true selfs voice volume and clarity. But it is a practice and must be done often and regularly or that friend will come back to visit more often.
Ive been a terrible self critic myself, it sucks because its a dirrect reflection of self esteem. I was fortunate enought to find a class on self esteem…and that also did wonders…it helped my true self debate that friend away to where it tool away the friends powerful voice.
I hope this makes some sense and that it helps you make peace within…or atleast gets you started on the path to peace…and just BEING…and being happy!

Kaitlin,
Who you are and who you will become have nothing to do with criticism either from others or yourself. It is because you make good choices. That won’t change if you stop abusing yourself with these thoughts. About 3 years ago, I started to question everything. I saw a picture of what boys in high schools are doing to each other in order to fit in. It showed the cuts and welts that completely covered the backs of two boys. They looked like beaten slaves from civil war movies. I asked, “if this how we treat each other now in order to be considered worthy, is that right?” I then began a year long process of questioning every time I felt judgement from others and myself and asked wether it was valid (provable or opinion) given with compassion (in love and with my best interest) and wether if what was being judged was in anyway related to who I really am (or was it just superficial garbage). I hope this helps, because in my case almost no judgement of who I am met any of these requirements. It will probably be the same for you. You are also a perfectionist so let me fix that now. Your good had always been and always will be better than most peoples best. So go easy, you will still shine!