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Regret

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • July 24, 2017 at 10:51 am #159936
    Alexandria
    Participant

    When I was younger I was introduced to alcohol and weed by my cousins and brother. I went through a lot during those times I started at about 14 and just partied until senior year. During my junior year my younger cousin wanted to try weed so I did and we started smoking and drinking together. Were about 3 years apart. Now I am in college and living a clean lifestyle but I can’t help but be filled with regret and guilt for bringing her into those things at her age of 14. From what I know she is not a trouble maker and is now actually living with her mormon grandmother. But I just hope that she does not go down the wrong road. Can anyone give me advice on how to deal with this regret and guilt? Or what I can do to make this right?

    Thanks, Alexandria

    July 24, 2017 at 11:14 am #159940
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Alexandria:

    You can meet with her (or somehow communicate to her) your regret with her, share how this lifestyle hurt you and how you are doing better now, living differently. You can ask her for her forgiveness, offer to make reasonable amends to her, if you figure she was hurt by your influence back then.

    anita

    July 24, 2017 at 2:03 pm #159950
    Alexandria
    Participant

    Thank you for the advice Anita! What would you do if she won’t accept an apology?

    July 25, 2017 at 8:32 am #160078
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Alexandria:

    If your apology is adequate and sincere (and you can practice it here, write the apology and I would be glad to comment on it, suggest things for your evaluation in trying to improve and perfect your apology), and she rejects it, it is her right, she doesn’t owe you to accept your apology.

    Therefore, if she rejects your apology, you respect her choice. You definitely don’t argue with her, and you don’t attack her in any way for rejecting your apology. You express, again, your sadness and regret for the offense of the past and you can tell her that if she ever wants to talk with you about it, to please do so. You can also offer to help her in some way, so that your apology is not just words, but a willingness to act for her benefit.

    anita

    July 25, 2017 at 6:09 pm #160200
    Mark
    Participant

    Hi Alexandria,

    Maybe there is some way you can help your cousin to alleviate your guilt. I’ve found when I also feel better about myself when I help someone because I am focusing on the good that I’ve done instead of feeling like a bad person. Keep in mind she asked to try them with you, and she probably would have tried it anyway even if you didn’t do it with her for the first time. Know you can’t really do something about what’s already happened, you can only try to make things right going forward.

    July 30, 2017 at 8:28 pm #161184
    Marie
    Participant

    Try to find  way to connect with her and give a piece of advice about your crazy experience that was just a temporary happiness and never go back that vices again.

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