i could use some help… so a few months ago i met an incredible guy, we had a short whirlwind romance, he was going to move to another country shortly for work, he basically asked me to marry him and told me he loved me. but I freaked out, i was also in the middle of taking on a new life opportunity, moving somewhere new myself, and his over-enthusiasm just completely killed the whole thing for me. it got too much. unfortunately instead of dealing with it in a mature manner, i pretty much disappeared, basically just telling him its over via text. i know, horrible horrible. anyway he moved, i moved, life went on. we we’rent in touch but he was still on my facebook. anyway, 6 months down the line, a few weeks ago, i posted on my facebook wall that i was going back to my home city for a few days, he PM’d me saying he was going to be there sorting some stuff out for just 2 days, and only ONE of those two days co-coincided with my visit, we decided on doing dinner. but then facebook turned to texting turned to calls turned to skyping and before you know it i have fallen for him again. and now this time im in a place where i want something serious, with him. however he’s been quite on the fence, and in the beginning i thought it was because of my behavior last time. ive apologized and tried to explain things to him…whats really confusing is that when hes out and has a drink or two he tells me he misses me, when hes stark sober he tells me hes not thinking about our future or anything at all. he’s not as nice or considerate as he was last time, in fact sometimes i feel he’s deliberately mean. but im taking all of this as i messed up last time. only thing is, he says he cant do a long distance relationship, and i get that but i cant move to where he is right away! id have to date him for a few months and im only going to pack up my life and shift countries if he is willing to commit to me, get engaged or married…he says we should discuss this when we meet over dinner in the next few days… but it sounds to me like he’s a;ready throwing out ultimatums… i dont know what to do.