fbpx
Menu

Painful love addiction

HomeForumsEmotional MasteryPainful love addiction

New Reply
Viewing 4 posts - 31 through 34 (of 34 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #197431
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Talia:

    You wrote about this man: “He is 10 years older with teenage children which makes me think he’s a loving and caring person. He has been with his wife since they were 20… He supports his whole family… He has a cute house that they have been working on together for years”

    You wrote about your father: “My dad was the silent type who was usually very nice except for the maybe one or two times a month he would lash out and yell  or spank us. My mom was more the type to either yelling or making constant negative comments”.

    The following is a possibility: in your original home, your father was the good parent and your mother was the bad parent. (A child does think in all-or-nothing terms, good and bad). You figured if only you extricated the good parent from his marriage that is making him miserable, he wouldn’t be unhappy anymore and he would be the good, loving parent that you need, no longer lashing out at you once or a couple of times a month.

    And now, you are trying to extricate this man out of his marriage, so that he an be the …loving parent/ man you always needed in your life.

    anita

    #197441
    Anonymous
    Guest

    * didn’t reflect under Topics

    #197443
    Talia
    Participant

    That feels very, very true and real to me. Also in the ways I want to keep a distance there is a similarity. For example, I do not want to be overly close to my dad because it makes me feel uncomfortable and like it’s too little too late. He and my mom seem to get along better now that the kids are out of the house but it still seems like an odd, materialistic life of keeping up with the neighbors.

    I wouldn’t be able to be with the married man because I would not be able to fully trust him, would probably still be jealous and i would forever feel like an actual homewrecker. This has really been eye opening since I have not been able to really tell anyone except for a couple friends who think I just had a crush and that’s it.

    #197447
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Talia:

    I hope you can meet a man who is available, free to form a committed publically acknowledged relationship with you, a loving relationship. That, instead of extricating a man from an unhappy marriage.

    It is difficult enough, the first option, that is, finding an available man who is honest and trustworthy and loving. The second option is way more difficult, more unlikely to successfully execute.

    Post again anytime.

    anita

Viewing 4 posts - 31 through 34 (of 34 total)

You must be logged in to reply to this topic. Please log in OR register.