Dear lightsource:

I can relate, I too didn’t like my nose and a few other features of my body. What happens when that happens is that one feature, let’s say the nose, becomes The Focus. First thing you see in the mirror, or in a photo is that nose. It is as if everything is blurry except for that nose: there it is, as if magnified and in focus while the rest of the face is blurry and marginal. And then, away from the mirror and photos, as you socialize, you think (don’t you?) that everyone else is seeing the same as you do, basically, they all see The Nose.

It is difficult to undo this kind of focus, the brain is set this way. When you look in the mirror, try to see the rest of your face, focus on your eyes, forehead, elsewhere. Give other parts of your face equal time, take the nose of central stage. Every time you focus on your nose you encourage future focus. Every time you look elsewhere, you discourage that focus.

Remove the shame from your nose experience. You are not inauthentic now for not having your original nose. Your nose never defined you in objective terms, really. It was not who you were or who you are. It was only a nose.

Remove the shame and regret. You did the operations you did because you needed to feel better. And it could have been the way for you to feel better. It does work for some. There was no way for you to know that for you, it will not work out.

There is so much more to you than The Nose. It is only a nose.

I hope to read more from you.

anita

Dear lightsource:

You are welcome and thank you for your appreciation. Yes, a nose is just a nose. It is indeed a matter of focus and there is plenty about you more worthy of your focus.

anita