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Need wisdom for time of feeling inadequate

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  • December 15, 2016 at 9:25 am #122791
    Nina Sakura
    Participant

    Focus on developing your music, your skills on a daily basis – try to be better than what you are yesterday.

    There will be people who will be better or worse than you in this area. The cycle of comparing is pointless. What you need to see is how you can get ideas and improvement points from others.

    Accept that your music is good but have the humility to improve.

    This all boils down to a fixed vs growth mindset. Manage your negative thoughts.

    When you feel overwhelmed by how good they are, tell yourself you are lucky to be around such talented people. It means you are talented too and can learn from them as well.

    December 15, 2016 at 9:51 am #122794
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear hollypop:

    To add to Nina’s wise, very well articulated advice:

    When you realize you just compared and felt the resulting resentment, don’t chastise yourself for thinking and feeling so. Don’t say to yourself something like: “I shouldn’t feel this way; I should feel that way instead.”

    There is a valid message to the comparing and resenting, the message I believe is that part of you is hurting for believing you are not good enough. Not as a musician, but as a person. The “not good enough/ not worthy enough” is dwelling at the moment in this particular comparison, because you are currently involved with music. But if you weren’t, this “not good enough” core belief would have dwelt in another context.

    This is why the core belief needs to be attended to, more.

    anita

    December 15, 2016 at 2:40 pm #122824
    Holly
    Participant

    Nina, that is a much more positive way of looking at this. I AM lucky to be around such talented people for the reason that I can learn from them.

    anita, very true – I will have a good think about this and hopefully find the root of the problem and try to fix it.

    Thank you both 🙂

    December 15, 2016 at 8:41 pm #122839
    Anonymous
    Guest

    You are welcome, hollypop. Post anytime.
    anita

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