hello.

Right now I am honestly in a somewhat dark place. Nothing serious just honestly really hurt and feeling screwed over. So basically this summer I graduated from high school, took a month long road trip at the end of June until the middle of July. When I came back I went to go to smoothie king with my BF, we’ve known each other since 5th grade and have always stayed really close. So when we went for smoothies, we basically spent 1hr and 30 mins talking about her relationship with her new BF she told me a bunch of stuff and we sorta spoke about college and that was it, I drove her home and that was it. So she was supposed to be leaving August 2nd for college. She then texts our other best friend (we’re kind of a best friend trio) and I that she leaves the 17th. That was the last I had heard from her, this was about a week ago. Saturday I got a text from her boyfriend asking if I was free to come and surprise her with a goodbye party. I had texted him a little under 2 weeks ago asking if he wanted to gang up with me to plan a surprise party, he said yes and that he’d get back to me. I assumed that since she was leaving the 17th he just never got back to me because we had more time and planning didn’t need to be done ASAP. So anyways, Saturday I got a text about 3 hours before this impromptu party was supposed to happen, so I scrambled to get ready because I was at my dad’s house that day and was a ways away. I showed up and we were waiting and I overheard our other best friend talk about how my best friend and her had a sleepover Friday night. I at the time didn’t really think much of it. So Sunday literally was my birthday. I go on Instagram to scroll and I click on my best friend’s story and its a picture of the airport saying “bye Home!!”. I didn’t really piece it together. I honestly thought it was a joke because at her party  someone made a joke about her leaving the next day and she was laughing. Then later it just kept replaying in my mind, and I f#cking realized she was actually gone. I texted her boyfriend and he was shocked I was even asking him. He said he thought I knew.

So there I was on my birthday with the realization that my best friend left me without even letting me know, or even the desire to meet up again and say goodbye. Just nothing. I honestly don’t know what to do. I’m not mad I’m just really hurt. Like I feel like that just shows how much it meant to her. Do I tell her how I feel? Do I talk to my other best friend who has kinda been blowing me off today?? Idk what to do help/advice?