Home→Forums→Emotional Mastery→Let's Conquer anxiety, depression and stress together!
- This topic has 7 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 9 years, 3 months ago by Karlo.
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July 7, 2015 at 3:49 am #79443KarloParticipant
Hi everyone!
First of all, this topic should provide some guidelines for those who suffer from anxiety, OCD, depression caused by low self-esteem and low self-confidence, who think that they are lost!
So let’s find ourselves, conquer those bad feelings and strive towards better life and our dreams!Who am I?
In short, 19 years old guy from southern Europe, raised in the Catholic Christian family.
I suffer from anxiety, OCD, have low self-esteem and low self-confidence.
For the sake of post’s length, I won’t provide much detail about myself, but if you are interested, don’t hesitate to ask me!Do you have a sick feeling in your stomach or heartburn all the time? These are one of the indicators that you have anxiety.
Washing your hands repeatedly, checking everything that is right in its place? These are most common indicators of OCD.So, let’s go straight to the point and start with the guidelines!
First (Denial is a big mistake) – I can’t stress out how important is to confess to yourself that you have this condition.
Don’t be in denial, if you have the flu, don’t go out of the bed and pretend to be strong and think ‘I can handle everything’, go back in your bed, eat some chicken soup and drink tea before you get better!Second (Start with small goals) – If you have low self-confidence and self-esteem you will need to boost it.
For example, go and do things that you have never done in your life, achieve your personal goals!
And what is more important when you achieve them, reward yourself with kind words! Some of my personal goals: Having a healthy diet, running and exercising every day, meditation, tea drinking, volunteering.Third (Ups and downs) – Every now and then you will be facing failures, and that is perfect! Why? Because you will need to learn how to deal with them! Don’t know how? Expect them! Easier said than done, but succeed rate will increase if you try more and more. (This will make you grow up from the inside)
Most important thing is not to forget to stand up (once again) and keep going!
Small advice: Believe me, if you ever had the opportunity to experience intrusive thoughts, you know how ugly and hard is making them disappear.
Still don’t know how to conquer them? DO NOT fight against them, just accept them! Because YOU are NOT your thoughts, you are defined by your actions! You are not a monster, murderer, rapist, pedophile etc…The fruits of your labor – You should feel anxiety level decrease if you boosted your self-esteem and self-confidence, and when your anxiety decreases, your OCD ‘rituals’ should decrease as well or vanish completely.
NOTE that these are my personal preferences and experiences, helping me to overcome my fears and conditions!
To use or not to use medications?
I don’t want to take magic pills because… I want to experience everything at the moment I live in, from pain to joy and happiness.
My personal preference is not to use them. Why? Because I believe there are tons of things that you could do to help yourself instead of taking magic pill and sleep through the day.
As I have mentioned earlier, Running, drinking tea and meditation are my key elements of conquering anxiety and OCD.
Teas like: Lemon balm, valerian, passion flower, chamomile can help you in reducing anxiety. If you want to take pills, go for Rhodiola rosea!
Before you use something like Rhodiola you should visit your GP, explain him your situation and he should tell you the risks.To summarize everything that is important in this post:
Healthy living helps you feel calm. (Healthy diet, meditations, no bad habits, everyday exercise, etc…)
The feel of being worth by volunteering and achievement by doing hobbies will help you with gaining self-esteem and self-confidence.
The more self-esteem and self-confidence you got, you have a better chance of conquering anxiety and OCD.I’m attending group therapy and helping people with various problems and conditions.
Well, it is true that I’m only 19 years old and have lack of life experience, but I think that I can help you with my knowledge and experience gathered through my past 6 years of ‘suffering’ and give answers on other topics such as: relationships and break-ups, thinking about suicide, panic attacks, social phobia etc…Feel free to share your opinions about this topic, ask me anything and I will try to answer your questions shortly
Please forgive me if I spelled something wrong or grammar isn’t right (English isn’t my first language).with warmth and kindness,
KarloJuly 7, 2015 at 3:06 pm #79470AnonymousGuestDear Karlo:
Thank you for your enthusiastic post. Many good suggestions: facing reality; not denying it, setting goals and working on achieving them, expecting/ accepting failing and keep trying, not fighting your thoughts but accepting them, practicing good diet and exercise- all good stuff. Question to you: when you feel very low, depressed, discouraged- what do you do?
anitaJuly 8, 2015 at 4:47 am #79493KarloParticipantThat’s a good question!
I’m trying to accept situation I’m in, living in that moment of ‘hell’ gives me the power to move on because I haven’t achieved my final goals and dreams yet. I don’t know how to explain it better.
When you are feeling discouraged and low, set yourself a goal to overcome that moment.(And no, you can’t achieve that goal within minutes or hours, you have to give yourself time because that moment can last for a couple of months or even years based on the situation you’re in)Small advice: After accepting the situation you’re in, almost immediately your body will crave for bad habits like eating unhealthy, smoking, etc… (even if you had quit smoking 6 months ago) why? Because your body is returning to the point when you have been in the ‘bubble of comfort’.
Just burst that bubble, and give yourself a credit for developed self-discipline and move on.Thank you for a good question Anita and I’m glad that at least someone has read this post.
Anyone should feel free to ask more questions anytime!With kindness,
KarloJuly 8, 2015 at 6:59 am #79498AnonymousGuestDear karlo:
Thank you for your answer. What you are saying is to ACCEPT the situation I am living in, setting a goal, avoiding bad habits, self discipline.You remind me a bit of how I was only a short time ago, and I am 54… I believed I had the answers and I believed I could TEACH others – teach them not only what the answers are but what their questions should be. And although I have failed to change a single person’s life, although I failed to promote a single person’s well being (beyond, MAYBE, the moment, at times, maybe) I continued trying to FIX people over and over again. It is only recently that I found out how LITTLE I can do for another. It amazes me how much I invested and how little I achieved. Interestingly, the whole time I tried to fix others, I was not able to fix myself…
Do you have any thoughts or feelings about my input here? Can you relate at all?
anitaJuly 8, 2015 at 12:32 pm #79515KarloParticipantAt this point I lack life experience and I apologize for the short answer.
My opinion is that one of the hardest things in life to achieve is to change yourself the way you want, it is easier to help someone else and hide behind the mask.With kindness,
KarloJuly 8, 2015 at 1:51 pm #79521AnonymousGuestDear Karlo:
I think it is easier to try and help another because all it takes is an intellectual exercise in analyzing another’s life, another’s problems- it takes a short time out of my life to do so. But to change my own life- it takes ongoing work, moment by moment, at different times, different feelings. No break from one own’s life … except when focusing momentarily on another’s, on fixing another’s- a delusion and the payoff is: hey, I got a break from my own life and imagine I am making a difference in another’s.
anitaJuly 10, 2015 at 5:26 am #79608KathParticipantHere’s an advice my therapist gave me to build a positive self-image, and I think it works pretty well:
Carry dried peas (or sth. of a similar size) in one of your pockets. Whenever you have done something well, take one of the peas and put it in a different pocket. Look at the peas from this pocket at the end of the day and review what you did.
To do something well does not mean you have to do something extraordinary: It can be as little as getting up in time, if you have problems with that. Or making a healthy breakfast for yourself. Or finally sending that stupid mail you should have send a week ago. Or conquering a panic attack. Or calling a friend. Or being nice to someone/ having a nice little chat after which you feel good…This technique teaches you that you are able to shape your world and your feelings in small ways, it makes you feel more powerful and it trains the positive voice instead of your inner critic who is trying to put you down all the time.
Try it for a few days and let me know how it works out!
July 10, 2015 at 10:03 am #79615KarloParticipantHi Kath,
Thank you for the advice, I should try that! -
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