Dear Jeanne
To inspire you, read the life story of brave and powerful Jeanne d’Arc, or known in english Joan of Arc: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joan_of_Arc
I am deeply touched by your story and am sorry to hear that people have turned their backs on you. Now, I am not bipolar but my father is and I myself struggle with anxiety and depression. I have anxiety and panic attacks for no reason (or not clearly) and it’s hard and very difficult to explain to others. But I have decided to not let this define me. I know, this may seem very rude to say, but you need to get your vision about you straight: yes, you have these issues and illnesses, and yes, they are probably always going to be a part of you BUT they are not all you are.
With the right mindset, a therapist (you didn’t mention you are seeing anyone?) and maybe the right medication (doesn’t need to be forever) you will find your way. I really do wish you all the best, please don’t give up – ever!
Much love,
Helen