Home→Forums→Relationships→I've got a interesting question
- This topic has 3 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 8 years, 5 months ago by
janet.
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December 2, 2016 at 6:49 am #121731
Peter
ParticipantFor what my opinion is worth
Trust your initial instinct of blocking all calls and creating a clean break.
Noting is worse than the drama of a on again off again relationship based on inferred intentions.
We can never know with certainty what another person is thinking or why they are doing what they want to do. However one would hope that a authentic relationship those involved would not have to to infer intention but could be honest with each other.That you are playing the inferring intention game could be a sign that the relationship is not authentic and that it is time to move on and seek out better. You deserve better.
Through personal experience and observation I know how strong the pull is leave the door open just a little after a break up. There are psychological reasons behind this need and overly simplified perhaps I might call it the ‘Just in case’ affect.
Keep the door open: Just in case something better doesn’t come along, Just in case I start feeling lonely
Just in case my ego needs the boost of knowing someone is waiting for me – control, just in case….Just in case isn’t good enough. Don’t accept Just in case from yourself or from others.
December 2, 2016 at 7:24 am #121734Nina Sakura
ParticipantOh yes it’s him.
Please trust your instincts rather than old residual feelings.
Cheating multiple times, all this random talking nonsense after 4 years – sure you like him still but he ain’t worth this much trouble.
You deserve a better guy who is honest and sincere about things, especially so in long distance.
I do not buy this whole plutonic nonsense.
This is pretty man talk for I can’t commit to one girl alone and need my non committal female companion harem.
I am sorry if I came across as offensive in any way but seriously I have seen too many awesome girls take shit from guys because they happen to “care” still and forget what he has done cummalatively.
December 2, 2016 at 9:17 pm #121785janet
ParticipantThank you all for the replies. I haven’t talk to him two days now. I feel better by now. It’s been 6 weeks but we were fighting the first two then talking ok the next two after that. He knows how to reel me in by subtly making me believe we are making progress. And I know his MO. Right now what I need to do is build strength for when he comes back saying so hey how u been doing? And then he turns that into reeling me back in. And I’ve always been so damn gullible. He never even has to ask me to come back. It’s so twisted. He finds ways to win me over and coerce me into making the decision that he can’t balls up and ask. If I don’t stay busy literally every second I think of him and fight having a breakdown. Although it’s a bit easier everyday.
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