Hi Everyone,

Its been happening since 3-4 years constantly and at completely different unrelated stages. Things just fall apart at the last moment, I put my heart and soul into something and at the last moment something unexpected happens and leaves me devastated, lonely and depressed.

The first time it happened was when I met this girl, I completely was into her and we were best friends for year. We became more than friends and after a while she left me without giving a reason. I was broke and suffered emotionally as well as socially. She was the only person I could feel like talking to. Its been 4 years now and I still feel lonely although I’ve friends.

The second time it happened was when I was playing hockey at the state level, the national team recruiter was unaware that he was sitting next to my father and while talking about the game he said that the player wearing jersey number 3 (me) is really good and I bet that he’s gonna be in the National team. Coming these words from the team recruiter were naturally promising and I was confident about my performance. But when the lists came out, there was no mention of me. It felt so bad. I’d been training for that moment that never came. It happened the same year.The feeling of loneliness continued.

The third time it happened when I was studying abroad. It was my first semester of the first year, I did badly just because I couldn’t find my classes interesting, so in the second semester I wanted to switch to science classes. But on the third day of the second semester, I broke my right humerus and doctor made it clear that I won’t be able to write for about 1.5-2 months and it’ll take 3-4 months to heal. I had to drop out and because my grades weren’t good enough, I was told to withdraw from the university. It felt like a mountain just shattered upon me. I cried. I didn’t know what to do. I mailed them stating my circumstances and kindly they gave me a second chance. But the damage had been done. I’ve been depressed since these 3-4 years and the feeling of loneliness never leaves me away. Its like a shadow following me. I don’t know what to do. Is anyone willing to talk to me over email? It would help a lot.