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Is my friend abusing me?

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Viewing 3 posts - 76 through 78 (of 78 total)
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  • #412577
    Anonymous
    Guest

    How are you, Caroline? Merry Christmas!

    anita

    #412606
    Caroline
    Participant

    hello Anita

    Firstly I would like to thank you for your precious advise and apologize for not responding earlier.I want you to know I have read this at the time and changed my behavior and expectations toward myself a bit.

    “neither she, nor you, Caroline, should expect yourself to talk as much as she does. It is  not your job or your duty to match how much she- or anyone else- talks.”

    “offer your acceptance of- and respect-  for yourself: it’s a precious thing to offer!”

    I thought you were right, because if we ever have an argument or she will see I am not as cheerful as she thought I was (I can “pretend” but she will eventually see it and find me boring or something) it may be a problem. So better I act how I really am – not speaking much, being rather calm, not excited – if she accepts me and respects it, it will be better for our (work) relationship in the future. Right? And she will respect me for having my own personality and not pretending. AND I feel better about myself too -not pressured into pretending someone I am not.

    “Let’s say, she calls you and you feel angry at her (for no valid reason, or you are not aware of the reason you feel angry)- in this case, if I was you, I would contain my anger and not express it.” -That’s a good advise, very thoughtful to behave like this. Thank You Anita.

    Merry Christmas!

     

    #412608
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Caroline:

    You are welcome, thank you and good to read back from you (no reason to apologize, as far as I am concerned).

    Better I act how I really am – not speaking much, being rather calm, not excited – if she accepts me and respects it, it will be better for our (work) relationship in the future. Right?“- yes, mutual respect always helps work relationships and personal relationships!

    AND I feel better about myself too -not pressured into pretending someone I am not“- respecting yourself (not pretending to be someone you are not) helps your relationship with yourself, and that feels better!

    anita

Viewing 3 posts - 76 through 78 (of 78 total)

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