Dear Nina:

I am a great believer in the nurture part of the nature vs nurture debate as far as human behavior goes. For example, I believe, we are all born with fear, and there is just so much any child can fear before getting overwhelmed and the body automatically shutting down. I believe that we are all vulnerable to the very powerful and destructive affects of excess fear that is ongoing (anxiety). In other words, we are all born with “an anxious gene”-

So even though your mother was as strong as a rock raising you, the excess fear she experienced must have leaked through that rock that she was. How can it be otherwise?

It is very difficult to face one’s fear and I am doing this these very days. The benefit I see in recognizing the origin of one’s anxiety is the hope of healing that excess fear. If you gain insight into what scared you as a child, repeatedly, you have a chance to face it, become aware of it.

All these fears, they have their origin in what really scared you as a child.

And that fear of childhood will not quiet down until you attend to it. Not all at once and maybe only with help of a competent therapist.

anita