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Insecure and in need of self confidence,

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  • November 17, 2013 at 9:56 pm #45424
    Melanie
    Participant

    With all of my relationships, I seem to run into a stumbling block – I get incredibly insecure and distrustful and suspicious – this leads to me watching my mans every action and reading much more into a situation than there is, causing fights and the end of the relationship.

    In my last relationship I found that he had been checking out girls (friends of friends) online, and lying about watching porn of young girls, and it got to the point where I felt incredibly insecure about myself. I am often told I am amazingly pretty, but when I saw him looking at these hot girls, ten years my junior, my sex drive and confidence just left.

    I still worry I will never find a man who will make me feel like the centre of his universe. Is there such a thing? I am I asking for too much?

    I know I need to love myself, and I think I do, but how to I get the self confidence to not be worried by his ogling younger girls?
    Thanks

    November 17, 2013 at 11:36 pm #45426
    Brian
    Participant

    Hi Melanie,

    I’m replying to this because I feel like I’m in a very similar situation to yours, but I’m the man who wants to make a girl feel like she’s the centre of my universe. So there are guys like me out there, so you shouldn’t think that you’re asking too much. We’re just much harder to find, but I feel like if you stop looking, they’ll come to you.

    As for this guy who likes younger girls, while that’s probably a normal thing for guys to be interested in, it’s not something that should worry you. You would get that self-confidence back by ending that negative relationship. He seems to be rather immature and unable to communicate his feelings, as he lied to you about the porn. Because if you do love yourself, then you won’t let someone like this be a part of your life and cause you this self-doubt.

    I hope this helps.

    November 18, 2013 at 11:27 am #45439
    JoJOe
    Participant

    Walk into the nearest Nursing Home. They’ll love that you came even if they don’t know your name. It’s where you need to go.
    Spend time and explore the deterioration of the body the mind.
    But if you spend sometime, you will see something else.
    Now look at your future sitting on those beds, in those chairs, see the zen, see the acceptance, see the reality of your future.
    So now you leave through the doors with your youth and you think. WOW oh WOW
    What am I going to do today that is FANTASTIC……….

    I have an ex boyfriend. Well, I have many of them.
    But one asked me to have surgery to tighten my lower belly.
    To him I said
    “ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND !!!!!! THIS IS MY GREATEST CREATION, THIS IS MY SON, THIS IS MY LEGACY, THIS IS MORE REAL THEN YOUR EYES THAT ARE BLINDED MORE THAN THE BLIND”

    November 18, 2013 at 4:23 pm #45461
    Melanie
    Participant

    Thanks Brian, and yes it does help. It is nice to know there are men out there who also seek what I seek and yes, once I just start enjoying myself and my life, I’m sure he will come along. As you say, it is when you stop looking that they find you…

    November 18, 2013 at 4:25 pm #45462
    Melanie
    Participant

    Thanks jojoe. Your advice is appreciated also. All the best to you too, m

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