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Inlaws mistreating me

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  • This topic has 6 replies, 3 voices, and was last updated 7 years ago by Anonymous.
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  • November 20, 2017 at 7:06 pm #178841
    Unlocked
    Participant

    Yes I have a question I am married but my husband family they disrespect me calling me b****** trying to fight me then getting my face and my husband don’t say nothing about it so what should I do

    November 20, 2017 at 11:41 pm #178869
    Gev
    Participant

    To understand the situation correctly there are a few details are needed

    1. Since how long you are married.

    2. Was your wedding with the consent of in laws.

    3. Do you all stay together.

    Giving all the details will certainly help to suggest some ways to resolve your problem.

    thanks, Gev

    December 5, 2017 at 6:03 am #180601
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Unlocked:

    You posted your question again on another thread, so I am bringing this one back to the top and hope you correspond here and that it will be somewhat helpful to you.

    You asked what does it  mean, that your husband is allowing his parents to clearly mistreat you, as in calling you names. It means that he either agrees with them, that you are worthy of mistreatment or he disagrees with them but is afraid of them, afraid to disagree with them, to stand up to them, to assert himself.

    There is another possibility: that he doesn’t care one way or another.

    Question, so to figure out his motivation: do his parents mistreat him as well, directly, calling him names, or otherwise? Did he share with you that they used to mistreat him?

    anita

    December 12, 2017 at 7:40 pm #181865
    Unlocked
    Participant

    Fast as I’m thinking they don’t mistreat him it just they mistreat me is because I tried to keep him out of trouble it got to the point to what his uncle call me b****** they get in my face trying to fight me and my husband don’t respect me he abused me he talk to me like I’m not nothing he takes my money his family kicked them out do to him stealing and I still had his back he got my kids taken away and I still stayed try to make it work I need help I don’t know what to do can you please help me so I can get my life back on track I know I was wrong but I am paying for it and I’m just trying to get my life back on track even if I have to leave my husband today and I am not going back

    December 13, 2017 at 8:02 am #181933
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Unlocked:

    When you post again, can you place periods at the end of sentences? That would make it possible for me to understand you better.

    You wrote that you tried to keep your husband out of trouble. What is the nature of that trouble?

    And how did you try to keep your husband out of trouble?

    anita

    December 13, 2017 at 10:52 am #181973
    Unlocked
    Participant

    My husband will go to jail all the time and I’ve been talking to him about the crowd. that he continued to hang around with and it all begin with the mistreatment of him take my money he mistreating me .as I said I got my kids taken from me and I stay on as though if you suspect to try to make it work I’ve been with my husband for 6 years. and we is married and I just need some help and support to try to find something better is because I feel that my husband don’t love me because he just told me today that he have to have proof that his cousin is doing these type of things to me .and I don’t want to be with nobody like that no more.

    December 13, 2017 at 11:10 am #181979
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear Unlocked:

    The periods helped, thank you. I understand why you “don’t want to be with nobody like that no more”.

    It is a bad thing for you, to be mistreated. Because your inlaws have been mistreating you, you must not be in their presence, so that they don’t have the opportunity to mistreat you.

    Can you separate from him, divorce him, cut contact with him?

    anita

    December 15, 2017 at 6:16 pm #182445
    Jolli
    Participant

    Hello, I would like to see what you’ll think about my situation and the best way to deal with it.
    I have been a part of my now-husband’s life for the past 2 years. We married and have lived together for 2 years now.

    He has a younger sister, divorcee with 2 kids. The sister continuously asks my husband for help with the kids – she’ll call on our day off and ask to pick up the kids from school, or drive them to swim classes, always just so happens that she needs his help just on our day off together.

    I have told my husband that it’s important for me that we spend this one day a week together, with no interruptions, be it on running errands together, or going on an adventure, but while we do not have our own kids, I want to enjoy our relationship.

    He has not confronted his sister about this at all. Continued to help her as much as his schedule allowed him to.

    Finally I broke, and I confronted her. I just wanted her to realize how she is abusing our time off, our relationship has taken a toll because of her, we have argued multiple times about her and how she always needs help. My confrontation now turned into her calling me out on all of my issues, and what she truly thinks of me (which is all very negative, things nobody wants to hear from their worst enemy, things that I don’t agree with and some of them seem to be made up, but that is not my point).

    Now we are in the middle of planning our church wedding, the big reception, planning to buy a house, a new beginning to our life together. How do I continue to fit into his family, when his sister ignores and hates me, my husband will not take sides so he stays quiet and hopes it will blow over.

    How do I continue to plan our wedding, and face my “sister in law”?

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